kindness

I am sure by now that sometime in your life you have heard the phrase “What would Jesus do?”. Well, I understand and respect that is how some people live their lives and base their decisions. I try to live my life by “What would Leah do?”. You see, Leah was my grandmother’s name and she was the kindest person I have ever known and the most beautiful woman I have ever known…inside and out. Her hair was always set and she always applied her “liquid beauty” (foundation) everyday, and always left a pink or red kiss mark on my cheek. She had fur coats in her closet and always wore an apron in the kitchen. She and my grandpa would have their 5:00 o’clock Manhattan every night before dinner (if you were lucky – you got the maraschino cherry) and she always dressed for going out. In my eyes, she was glamorous.

Every week she would go to the Salon for her set and if I was lucky I got to go too. Going out with her was like being a part of a celebrity’s entourage (of course riding in her Cadillac didn’t hurt). Everywhere we went, be it the grocery store or the post office, everyone knew who she was. She always remembered their name and made them feel like they were the only person in the world and that everything they said was important. I can remember watching their conversation, and watching the other person’s eyes start to sparkle when they realized my grandmother remembered them and remembered their stories and I can remember thinking to myself “I want to do that”.

She always remembered birthdays, for family and friend alike. When you and life were having a battle and life was winning, a homemade lemon loaf or a kind note of support would appear at your door. When a grandchild needed a tissue one always appeared – sometimes from her sleeve if it was the fall or her cleavage if it was the summer. (no sweater to tuck away a tissue). When I bought my first home she arrived with 3 gifts for me – a milkglass vase, wood hangers (so clothes would hang properly) and a full length mirror. I was told to never leave the house without checking the latter.

Be kind. Smile as you pass others on the street. When you ask someone how they are – mean it and listen to their response. Before you leave the house, check the full length mirror and ask “What would Leah do?”

I sat down to write about products today and as I began to write I realized, nope. That’s not what today’s tale is going to be about. Today’s tale is about kindness. You see, I know you are expecting funny tales of my daily escapades in my shop or tales of products and how to use them. Today I feel I must write about kindness. You see I believe that kindness is a HUGE factor in beauty, be it physical beauty or spiritual beauty.

When I speak of kindness, I don’t mean holding the door open for an elderly person – that is called courtesy, I don’t mean avoid name calling – that is called having manners. I am speaking of kindness – truly listening to the person who is speaking to you, being happy for them and their achievements, how ever trivial you may think they are. Lifting someone’s spirit’s up – not pushing them down to where it makes you feel comfortable. Honestly, everyday I see or hear people choosing to be unkind and it stills astonishes me. Yep, I’m going to be 40 in a few weeks and I still don’t understand why anyone over the age of 12 chooses to be mean or chooses to belittle the dreams of others.

At least once a week I meet a woman who has changed her cut or color and loved it just to have her husband or best friend tell her it is a disaster or a huge mistake. While I help them wipe away their tears (yes…9 out of 10 times they are crying), I ask them “Do you like your hair?” and they say “Yes, but…” and before I let her finish, I tell her, “If you like it, who cares what they think anyway? If you are happy with your new look, that is what is important. You must do what you like, because in the wee small hours of the morning, it is you and you alone with yourself and your thoughts. People are gonna talk anyways, why not really give ’em something to talk about?”. Then we laugh together, and I help her find a product to help keep her new look going, or sometimes I just give her a hug and a tissue and tell her “they need our sympathy, you can’t fix stupid”.

Not to sound all hippie, gonna “buy the world a coke” kind of thing, I want you to try something. Next time you hear someone excited about something, be excited with them. I don’t care if they are excited because they found a dollar on the street or their child just got into Harvard or they finally had the guts for fire engine red streaks put through their hair. Whatever it is, it means something to that person and who are you or I to take that happiness away from them? If we can be happy for a child who has just found a nickel and thinks they are rich and we can join in their enthusiasm, why not be happy for someone who has a dream and has the guts to chase after it? We have all been there, so happy and excited over something and somebody comes along and dumps on it. Being cruel and unkind is ugly, not one ounce of beauty in that kind of behavior.

Be happy for others. Just be happy for them. It’s really that simple.