Gather ’round ladies and gents, boys and girls, it’s that time once again, time for That girl in the red coat’s Tales of Truth. Wow…part 13. Each time I write my Tales of Truth installment I am always surprised that I have more truths to tell. Just when I think I have heard and seen it all, the powers that be bestow a gift unto me, and I was taught to share, so here we go.

– I hear the all too familiar chirp of the shop’s door chime and look up to see a woman huffing and puffing. I give my standard greeting and ask if there is anything I can help her with. “UH YEAH! What are you blind? Look at my hair!”. I look at it and it looks fine to me, so I ask her what it is she is unhappy with. “It’s so straight and I have bought every curl cream out there and still no curl! No wave! It’s all shit!”. I asked her if she had natural curl – because the majority of curl products/curl enhancers are formulated to enhance natural curl – they will not create  curl. “I know that! I have natural curl. I use a flat iron everyday!”. ….wait for it…there you go.

– A woman came in asking if I sold any natural hair care lines. I introduced her to SOMA – which is vegan, sulfate free and is biodegradable. I also showed her our Onesta collection – which meets the strict EU criteria. She looked at me and said that there was no way the products were natural – because the packaging was plastic. I started to explain  that it was the product inside the bottles that were meeting her criteria, to which she responded “I don’t think you know what you are talking about.” ….sigh

– A woman came in looking for a particular hair spray from Kenra. I let her know that I didn’t stock that line but was able to order it for her. She looked at me and said “Let me look around. I will recognize the bottle when I see it.”. Once again I let her know I didn’t stock the Kenra line but was able to order her product for her. “Oh dear – you don’t know what it looks like, I do. Let me keep looking around and I will find it.”. After about 5 minutes, she came up to the front counter and said “I see you don’t carry Kenra – can you order it for me?”.

– The phone rings. As I am saying my standard greeting I am interrupted by “I just watched a you tube video about highlighting hair at home and was wondering if I can have my hair like that girl!”. I explained that I was sure one of my stylists could help her achieve the look she wanted in our Salon to which she responded “Oh! So they have seen this video too?”.

– At our shop we sell the WET BRUSH – the BEST brush out there for ridding your tresses of tangles and knots. I had someone ask me if it was meant for all hair types and I let them know that it was, and that some of the local pet groomers found the WET BRUSH and the WET COMB worked well with dog and cat hair. The customer looked at me and said “I meant all body hair types”….my mind’s eye flashed to a well and a bucket with lotion in it.

– a woman came in looking for wax for hair removal. I walked her over to our selection of waxes and asked her if she needed a cream wax with strips or a hard wax without strips. She asked me what wax was best for removing nose hair. Yep…nose hair – my eyes instantly watered at the mere thought of it.  I let her know that a nose hair trimmer may be more of what she was looking for – a little easier to use and less mess and chance of injury. “I guess I shouldn’t try waxing my husband’s ear hair either huh?”  – I told her that may be best.

– at the front counter I have a dish of complimentary candies. I love a little something sweet and like to brighten people’s day. A woman asked me why I had free candy. I told her “to help add some brightness to your day.” to which she responded “you could at least have my favorite.” and walked out.

Things I have heard over the past month;

“I want some polish for my toes but all I can find is nail polish.”

“I want a firm hold hairspray that has a soft hold”

“I want a conditioner that works more like a shampoo than a conditioner”

“Do you sell that stuff that everyone is talking about?”

“My flat iron cools down too fast once it’s unplugged”

“If I don’t like how this brush brushes my hair, can I return it?”

“Is there anyway to file your nails without using a nail file?”

Last, but not least – the time is 5:45 p.m.. The phone rings. Before I can finish my greeting I am asked what time we close. I let the woman on the phone know that we were closing at 6 p.m. “I am out of town and could get there by 7  – can you wait at the store for me and open it up for me? I really need some nail files.”.