Beauty, health and wellness, That girl in the red coat, Women

Take the time

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Yesterday yours truly was treated to a spa afternoon. My lovely friend invited me to join her for an afternoon of pampering. I put aside my reservations of an afternoon at the spa. You see, after being in the beauty biz and running a Salon, I know the health standards and the health codes, I know how spa tools are supposed to be cleaned and sanitized, hence my reservations. In the past I could never relax enough to enjoy the services, I found myself seeing the spa through the eyes of a manager instead of through the eyes of a client in dire need of some self care. I spent the morning getting myself into the proper head space so I could enjoy myself. …and let me tell you, I did.

We started with pedicures and I chose the color “self love” by SpaRitual for my toes.

Pink Salt Foot Detox

 

*FYI – SpaRitual is a Vegan polish. Cruelty free, free of any animal derived ingredients, gluten free, and free of Touline, Formaldehyde, Dibutyl Phthalate (DBP), Formaldehyde Resin, Camphor, Ethyl tosylamide, Xylene, MEHQ/HQ, MIT and Parabens.

We followed our pedicures with a Pink Salt foot detox and a session in the healing Salt Cave. Pink Salt is a powerful tool for rebalancing, revitalizing and gently cleansing the body and the mind. Salt Caves can help with breathing disorders, sinus infections and inflammation and many other respiratory and health ailments.

Enough about the services. The point of today’s tale is to come clean about something. After our pedicures, we were guided to the Pink Salt foot detox room and offered coffee, tea or water. I planted myself down in my tub chair, placed my feet on the Pink Salt and waited for my coffee. When our lovely guide came back, she gave me my coffee and said “this service will be 45 minutes long. No worries about watching the clock, we will come get you when your time is up” and left. I felt my stomach sink and for a brief moment I felt anxious and guilty that I was just going to sit down and treat myself, just to do it. I turned to my friend and admitted my feelings. I had a huge light bulb moment. I found myself thinking about all the women that feel the same way I did. How many times they and I put the needs of others before themselves and in turn began to resent others for it. I came to realize that some of my anger towards others wasn’t completely on them, it was on me too. More often than not, people have no idea that you have put yourself on the back burner to put them first. They have no idea of what you are feeling, thinking or what you need, because they are not in your head, plain and simple.

I know all too well life gets in the way and that finances don’t always allow for a spa day or even spa session. What I have come to realize is there is always time for self care, be it 5 minutes or if your lucky, an hour. Put down your phone. Boil the kettle and steep your favorite tea and take a seat and look out the window. Run yourself a hot bath with some Epsom salts (they sell them at Walmart…I know you go there). Give yourself an at home Mani, nothing fancy. Pull a Madge and simply soak your hands in Palmolive if need be. Grab your facial scrub and use it on your hands to exfoliate, follow with your favorite hand cream. Massage the cream in for two minutes. Most importantly, when doing any of these “self treats”, breathe. In through your nose, out through your mouth. Breathe. Let go. Be present. …and put down your phone.

We cannot possibly control every aspect of our life. Life will still be hectic. Children will cry, pets will get sick, bosses will be well, bosses. Plans will fall through, dinners will burn, spouses will be late. Sometimes you won’t be having the argument, it will be having you. No one is perfect, nor will they ever be. You are not perfect, nor will you ever be. You are allowed to feel overwhelmed. You are allowed to feel you are over your head. You are also allowed to take time for yourself. We all are. It’s time to put down the guilt baggage and leave it there. When we take care of ourselves, we are better equipped to take care of others. As one of my favorite Queer Eye gents ( I adore them all) Jonathan Van Ness says “It’s not vanity. It’s self care”

 

Take the time.

 

Beauty, Hair Care

Monday Motivator WOW factor

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…and here it is, once again. Monday. The snow is falling, the winds are blowing, Mother Nature has once again shown she is in charge. Facebook feeds are filled with school closures, road closures and delays. Parents are texting everyone they know, scrambling to find day care for their kids. When your week begins in chaos, you are left feeling out of control. There is one thing you can control…your hair. It may not seem like much, but you and I both know, when you are having a good hair day, it does make everything else seem a little more bearable. I may not be able to stop the snow from falling, or find you a babysitter on a moment’s notice but I can help you have a good hair day. Let me introduce you to some of my new found favorites from the Beauties at Color Wow. Meet Bionic Tonic Coconut Cocktail and Style on Steroids!

 

Color Wow Bionic Tonic Coconut Cocktail & Style on Steroids

 

I was first introduced to Color Wow 3 years ago when my rep brought in a root cover powder. In a word – AMAZING! Over the years, Color Wow has expanded their line to include shampoos, conditioners, treatments, styling products and tools among others. As you are well aware, yours truly is a bottled blonde, born a natural blonde – I have pictures to prove it, but a bottled blonde none the less. I have been coloring my hair for over 20 years, using a flat iron every day, so it’s safe to say, my tresses need all the help they can get. Let me tell you, I have tried more products than I can count and I have to say I am impressed. Here’s a break down of why I think you should give Color Wow Bionic Tonic Coconut Cocktail and Style on Steroids a go.

COLOR WOW Bionic Tonic Coconut Cocktail – this is a leave in supplement, not a leave in conditioner formulated for dehydrated, straw like hair. It mimics the natural lipid layer of your hair that is lost when chemicals, like color are applied to your hair. Apply a coin size amount to clean, damp hair before blow drying. Your hair will instantly feel smoother, have more shine, look more glossy and be frizz free thanks to this gem being humidity resistant. *this is a heat activated product – best results are when heat is applied.

* Color Wow offers two other cocktails –

  • Kale Cocktail – created for those of us dealing with breakage. It fortifies the bonds within the hair. With your first application your hair will be 50% stronger
  • Carb Cocktail – created for fine, limp hair. It bonds a high carb complex to the hairs surface to instantly produce mass and volume

COLOR WOW Style on Steroids – a texturizing spray created for color treated hair. This gem keeps your color vibrant and fresh. You may have found as I have that some styling sprays leave a cloudy film on your hair that dulls your color – Color Wow Style on Steroids does not! It contains moisturizing elastomers that give spring to your strands. Apply to dry hair before using a thermal styling tool like a flat iron or wand. Style on Steroids;

  • keeps your color vibrant
  • is never stiff or sticky – never a worry of strands sticking together
  • offers thermal protection
  • can be used as a refresher – apply in the morning to refresh yesterday’s style

* to add more volume to your ‘do – flip your head upside down, spray under layers and style as desired

* for a sexy, undone ‘do – spray throughout mid section and spread the product throughout your hair with your fingers. *great for separating curls

Check out their website – http://www.colorwowhair.com for more tips and tricks and to check out their complete line. Trust me Beauties, after using these products, the first words out of your mouth will be “WOW!”.

 

 

 

 

 

Beauty, health and wellness, Women

Sticks and Stones

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We all know the childhood chant “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names can never hurt me.”. Oh, how I wish that were true. There has been many a moment I would have taken a blow to the gut rather than an unkind or untrue phrase spoken. Physical bruises heal. Emotional ones, when it comes to healing, those suckers move at a turtles pace. I am 46 years old and there are still some words I cannot erase from my mind.

We’ve all heard them, I am sorry to say. We’ve been called a liar, useless, fat, ugly…you name it, at some point in our lives, someone has uttered these words to us, and sadly, we have uttered them to ourselves. What I find the most heartbreaking is when we let someone else’s words begin to define us. I admit, I have fallen victim to this, in the past and even in the present. I was beginning to listen to the shouts of self doubt that were unfortunately being boosted up by the words of others. Then one night, after a shit show of a day, I sat down in bed and looked over at a journal I had been given years ago. It’s Tiffany blue and embossed in gold were the words “be happy”. I reached over, cracked it open and began to write. I wrote how I feeling, what I was thinking. After, I felt better. My feelings were still hurt, I was still confused about what to do, but I felt better. The next night before bed, I wrote again. I have continued to do so each night. That’s the wonderful thing about writing in a journal, you get the questions out of your head and sooner or later, answers appear.

When I was younger, I heard my mother say something to a friend of hers that was going through a difficult separation “we hate in others what we hate in ourselves.”. I found myself writing that phrase in my journal. I also remember as a child being told “when you point a finger, there are three pointing back at you.”. While writing last night, I finally got it. I stepped outside of myself and took a good, hard look at the lives of those around me who haven’t been the nicest as of late. They are all going through something. Be it trouble at work, trouble with family, battling some inner demon, even battling addiction. I came to realize that when they were pointing the finger at me, they were also pointing it at themselves. To be clear, there is no excuse for hurtful words or actions. What I am saying is trying to understand where they are coming from may bring you some peace. I am well aware that I am not a saint. I have had my moments that I took the low road and went for the jugular. Over the years I have made a commitment to myself not to behave that way. I do my best to listen and understand. I will take whatever is coming to me, if I deserve it.

We all get angry. We all get down on ourselves. We all get frustrated with life, family, work, you name it. I think we should all be allowed to feel whatever we are feeling. I do not believe we should be allowed to be mean about it. There is no reason for that, there is no honor to yourself or the other person. Saying hurtful things for the sake of argument is childish. Plain and simple. I have come to feel sorry for those who have been hurtful for hurtful’s sake. In the wee small hours of the morning, for the rest of their lives, they will have to live with the fact that they purposefully hurt someone they love. That is something I wouldn’t wish upon anyone.

There is always a chance for kindness. As hard as it may be to do, we can stop saying something hurtful before we start. We can take a breath. When you feel like lashing out, take a moment to remember what you would do if you heard another person speaking this way. If you wouldn’t allow another person to speak in a hurtful way in your presence, maybe you shouldn’t either.