If you have ever held a can of hairspray in your hands, you have seen the warning label “contents under pressure may explode”. Over the past few weeks, I have run into many women that should have had (and read) the same warning label. Today’s tale is about easing up on yourself, and your loved ones…they can thank me later.

In these days of instant messaging and texting and minute to minute play by play status updates on Facebook and Twitter I know it is difficult for many to understand…I hope you are sitting down, sometimes, what you want will not always be there when you want it. I know…there there. It’s gonna be okay. Put your puffer away. Calm down. No need to bring on a stroke because the modem connection to the debit machine is slow and you have to wait….sniff….10 whole seconds. No need to stress out and cause yourself to lose your hair because your flat iron is on back order. If you are suffering from hair loss Nioxin is your answer…but I digress. There is no need to almost pull your child’s arm out of it’s socket and scream in their face because they are 2 years old and have been out all day listening to you complain that you cannot find the “right” shade of red nail polish and they don’t feel like walking anymore. Seriously….take a breath. Look around you. Do you have shoes? Are you wearing a coat? Do you own a cell phone? Have you eaten today? If you can answer yes to any of the above…you got it pretty good. Calm down.

Over the past few weeks;

– I have had a lady shake her curling iron in my face demanding I tell her why they don’t make the same model of curling iron (she bought it in 1987 – she had the receipt to prove it…I shit you not).

– I have heard women whine about their appointment needing to rescheduled because their stylist had to go to the funeral of her Aunt. (yep…they even tried complaining to me, seeing if I could get the stylist to come in before the funeral….yes….sorry to say, women like this exist).

– I have witnessed a woman break into a sweat over the debit machine redialing the modem connection. “Why is this taking so long?!? I have to get to the gym for Christ’s sakes!”. I told her it would be just a few more seconds to which she responded “You need a new machine!This one is crap!”. ….alrighty.

– I have the sweetest elderly couple that comes into the shop. They always come in for the Gehwol Herbal Bath – a lovely foot soak. The husband has some health issues and the foot soak makes him feel better so his wife likes to buy it for him. There were two boxes left so the couple bought them both. After they left a woman came up to the counter and asked if I had anymore of the Gehwol Herbal Bath. I told her no but I had more on order and delivery should be the following Monday. The woman got angry. I mean MAD. She actually accused the elderly couple of “hogging all the good stuff.”….Miss Congeniality ladies and gentlemen.

– From time to time the bar code changes on packaging and sometimes I miss it when unpacking the orders. When the bar code won’t scan, I can bring up a product list in the computer and select the product I am selling. I had a customer accuse me of looking up the product and taking my time on purpose because I knew she was on her lunch break… Wow.

We all have things to do and places to be. Every one’s time is just as important as everyone else’s. Take a breath. Choose your words and actions carefully – if you slip up and spew venom – apologize and mean it. Remember – contents under pressure may explode…and you never know where your shrapnel will land and the damage it may cause.