Gather ’round ladies and gents, girls and boys, it is time for that girl in the red coat’s Tales of Truth. Just when I think I have seen and heard it all, I hear the chirp of the shop’s door chime and VOILA!, more tales to be told. As I have stated before, all these tales are true, they are based on actual events. The tales are not those of fiction, unfortunate, yet true.

(before I begin our first tale – let me give you a little background tale) In Canada, we are slowly getting rid of our beloved penny…not the Penny from The Big Bang Theory…the currency. We can still accept pennies as payment, we are no longer giving them back with change. Now on with the tale. As I was finishing ringing through a customer’s purchase of RUSK Wless hairspray, I told her the total was $19.85. She looked into her wallet then looked up at me with the most terrified look in her eyes. I asked her “Is everything alright?”, to which she responded with “No!”. I asked her what was the matter to which she responded “I don’t have a nickel. I only have 5 pennies!”. So, I said “Okay, that is fine.” to which she said “Are you sure you won’t get in trouble for taking pennies now that they are abolished?”. I took a breath, told myself not to show it on my face, and explained to her the new “rules” about pennies to which she sighed “thank you for telling me, I was so scared every time I opened my wallet!”. …thank god she never worked the underground railroad.

I hear the familiar chirp of the door chime and look up to see a woman, staring at me. “Hello! Do you need my help with something today?” I ask. “I have a question for you about hairspray.” she says, then stares at me again. Dear lord…here we go. “What is your question?” I ask. She shuffles closer to me, bows her head and in a whisper asks “Is it safe to use hairspray?”. So, I did what anyone would do in this scene, I whispered back “why wouldn’t it be safe?”. (during all of this, all I could picture was the Eiffel tower in the background, a couple of cigarettes and a black briefcase containing “zee meecrofilm”.). It seems her sister in law told her that all hairsprays will change your hair color and that is why her hair was looking “brassy”. I told her that it was safe to use hairspray, that it will not change her hair color and that her sister in law needs a new hobby other than surfing the net. She bought two cans of Sebastian Shaper Plus.

It was about 10 minutes to closing. It seems the most interesting events happen to me within the first 20 minutes of my day or the last 10 minutes of my day at the shop, and most of the time without a witness. (I really gotta get a camera). Back to the tale at hand. A woman comes up to the counter asking for an appointment for a hair cut. I explain the Salon was closed but would be open again the next day and there was an opening for a cut if she wanted to take that appointment and come back the next day. She said she had to think about it and left. Within seconds she was back, I assumed to take the appointment. NOPE! “Have you accepted Jesus Christ into your heart?” is what she came back for. Before I could say a thing… “If you haven’t…do you want to be saved?!?….Oh, I wanted to be saved alright.

“Is this hair color temporary?” (there is a lime green sign that says “temporary color”). “Yes, it is. It will wash out within two washes, with shampoo”, I answer, with a smile, to which she answered “Pfft…two washes…that ain’t temporary. I know temporary and that ain’t it.”. …yep…this is my life.