Gather ’round ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls. Yes, it is that time again, another month has passed and a full moon is upon us. I used to think I was psychic, I could feel the shift of the tides, the shift in the karma of those around me. Now I know it was PMS. I know this because since my hysterectomy (getting the stupid cut out as I like to call it) I no longer get that psychic/one with the universe/could cry at the drop of a hat/punch someone in the face feeling once a month. I just see and hear some odd things and the calender confirms it…full moon.

A woman came in to the shop with three children in tow. Her daughter (age 4) saw our display of demo flat irons and curling irons and ran straight for them. “Be careful sweetie. Those can get very hot and you could burn yourself. Don’t touch them, let us help you”, to which the mother looked at me and told me “not to tell her children what to do.”. …it is 10 a.m..

The phone rings. A woman has called the shop looking for a product that helps psoriasis. I let her know of the many shampoo’s we sell that are formulated to help with such a scalp condition – Smart Solutions Problem Hair ‘n Scalp Shampoo is our best seller and has helped many of our clients and customers. She then asks me if I think it could help her. I let her know that without seeing her it is hard for me to say, but I am sure it would be fine. “I can’t get in today” she said and then began to describe in great detail the size of the flakes that she had on her head “about the size of a nickel.”. I thanked her for the description and let her know that from her description, it should be just the product for her. …it is 10:20 a.m. – I shit you not.

From time to time I do not carry a certain product, so I put in a special order for our customers. There is no extra charge, and I will hold it for them for 2 weeks. I called a customer this morning to let her know that her product had arrived. “Well! I can’t get in today!” she said. I reassured her that I would put the product behind the counter for her and that I can hold it for her for 2 weeks. “Bet you will charge me extra for holding it!” she says. I let her know there is no extra charge. “You’ll forget who it’s for and sell it to someone else!” she says. I reassure her I have put a sticky note on the can with her name on it. “What if another Carol comes in and you give it to her?” (names have been changed to protect the innocent…and my ass). I tell her that I have her phone number with her name on the sticky note so that won’t happen. “Bet it will rain the day I get there!” to which I respond “well, you got me there Carol”. …it’s 11:30 a.m.

A woman came in the shop and asked me if I knew why her hairdresser messed up her hair. After a few seconds, I just frowned and said “I’m sorry, I don’t know”. “Why won’t anyone tell me why she did this to my hair?”. So I asked her if she had spoken to her stylist to which she replied “Oh no. I can’t do that. I might hurt her feelings.”. …12:15 p.m..

Our Salon is closed on Mondays. It was quiet in the shop so I thought I would go back in the Salon and help the stylists out by going over the floors once more and making sure the back bar bottles were filled up and towels were folded and ready for the next morning. I hear the chirp of the shop door and come around the corner and greet the customer with my standard “Hi there! How are you today?”. “I want my hair cut.”. he says. I explain that the Salon is closed on Mondays and ask if he would like to make an appointment for another time. “Salon ain’t closed. You’re in it.”. I smile and answer “You’re right! I am in the Salon, just tidying up a bit preparing for tomorrow, the stylists are off today, so the Salon is closed.”. “No it ain’t…you’re in it. If it was closed you wouldn’t be in it.”. I take a breath, Smile and say “You’re right, the Salon is open, because I am in it. The stylists are not here, it is their day off.”. To which he says, “See, told you it ain’t closed”. Then he walked out.  …I have stopped looking at the time.