Beauty, communication, health and wellness, That girl in the red coat, Uncategorized, Women, writing

Christmas Presence

As I sit here, snow is falling, Christmas carols are playing on the radio, lights are twinkling on the tree and my loved ones are safe and snuggled under warm blankets watching a movie. I am relishing the peace for it is the middle of December, which for any of us in the service industry/retail sector, we know is the beginning of the craziest, busiest time of the year. I have been working the Holiday/Christmas season for over 20 years, and have seen it all, from mothers beginning to cry because the antlers that their child needed for the Christmas pageant broke and are now out of stock to husbands panicking that the KMS gift pack their wife wanted is no longer available and he can’t go home without it. I have seen grown women lose it over the fact the newest red holiday shade of polish is sold out and have had a grown man throw a flat iron at me because I wouldn’t return it for him because he didn’t have a receipt, or the box for that matter. One commonality I have always found – too many people are concerned about their Christmas presents instead of their Christmas presence.

Last year I wrote of the pressure women (and gents…mostly the ladies) put on themselves over the holidays (see link below)

https://thatgirlintheredcoat.com/2012/12/03/its-time-to-paint-your-own-picture/ .

I told a tale of letting go and easing up on yourself and your loved ones. This year, my tale will be one of presence. Too many of us are not present, in our own lives, in the lives of our loved ones, in our conversations, hell, even in our driving. We are getting so caught up in the idea of the perfect gift and the perfect dinner that we aren’t even able to keep up with who got who what gift and cannot even remember what that perfect dinner tasted like. Being me, I have compiled a little list, a how to for the holidays if you will.

– When you are out shopping with your child and they stop at the big tree in the mall exclaiming “WOW!!! It’s so pretty!” instead of yanking their little arm and scowling “yeah, yeah…lets go!” stand with them for a minute and agree with them. Take the few seconds, take a breath and make a memory.

– We all have those friends/family members that need a Santa picture. Here’s the deal, if your child doesn’t want to sit on Santa’s lap, don’t make them. Stand beside Santa holding your child, or forgo the picture all together. Your loved ones will survive a Christmas without a Santa photo. I know mine have. *Think about it…all year we scold “don’t talk to strangers” then force our kids to talk to  a stranger AND sit on his lap…no wonder there are so many tears.

– When you are shopping and a sales person asks if you need a hand, let us help you.  Let yourself be helped, it will ease the stress that you can’t find what you are looking for, and if by chance it is out of stock, we can let you know when the product is arriving and can call you when it arrives. …oh, for me, please do not say “already got two!” when we ask if you need a hand – trust me, we have heard it.

– Be kind to the cashier. She has been standing there for hours, has 5 more hours left of her shift and only gets a 30 minute break during an 8 hour shift, having to deal with people yelling at her for things she has no control over, like the debit being down, or a product being out of stock, or being yelled  at by a manager because she said “Merry Christmas” instead of “Happy Holidays”. – the latter happened to yours truly…I kept saying Merry Christmas.

– If your family doesn’t like turkey, you do not have to have it for Christmas dinner. It’s okay. The ghost of Christmas past, present and future will not haunt you. Make a meal that everyone enjoys, that you enjoy making. Trust me, I know of what I speak. I tried to do the “Christmas dinner with all the trimmings” and the whole day with every dish I prepared all I thought was who wasn’t going to like what and that I was disappointing Martha Stewart. This year I am making quesadilla’s. They are always a hit, everyone loves them and I spend less time in the kitchen and more time in the living room with my family.

– When you are getting your groceries, give to your local food bank. Many grocery store already have prepacked bags of food ready to give. Most packs cost $4.99 (the cost of your two morning coffees on your way to work)  and can give a family more than one meal. It’s a win/win, a mother will be able to make a meal for her child, and your child got to see their mother help her.

– Always give to the Salvation Army. The Salvation Army does more than you can imagine.

– Try not to complain so much about having to go to your Mother’s/Father’s house…again. Many have lost a parent, or both parents and wish that they had to sit through another conversation about how “easy we have it these days”.

This season, take it easy on yourself. Take it easy on your loved ones, for it is not their fault you are stressed that what you wanted to buy them is no longer available. Take a breath. Take a friend a coffee. Give to your local food bank. Make your hubby his favorite treat. Teach your child how to make cookies. Send a Christmas card or a text out of the blue. Smile as you pass people on the street or in the grocery aisle. Your Christmas presence will mean more to many than your Christmas presents will mean to one.

 

Beauty, Hair Care, health and wellness, That girl in the red coat, Women

You should hear sizzle at the stove….not at the vanity

STOP!!!!! Back away from the oil and the flat iron. Put them down. Think about what you are about to do. Does it make sense to add oil to dry hair then proceed to place a 400 degree flat iron on top of it? Picture a frying pan, picture it heating up to 400 degrees, picture oil being placed in the pan – what happens? What sound would you hear? EXACTLY – it would sizzle. Someone, somewhere started an ugly rumor that you can use oil and flat irons together. If you are trying to get your hair to the texture of wet cotton, you are well on your way.

All professional product lines have a product meant to be used with a flat iron. Thermal Protection Spray. They come in an aerosol format or your old school enviro friendly pump bottle. Whenever you use a flat iron it is highly recommended to use a Thermal Spray. It creates a barrier between the heat of the flat iron and your hair. It also helps to prevent breakage and damage that can be caused by flat irons (or curling irons for that matter). Here are a few gems;

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SOMA – Prism Shine Spray – adds shine and thermal protection *Almost all SOMA products aide in thermal protection

 

Joico Iron Clad

JOICO – Ironclad – a humidity resistant fast drying , non sticky formula that offers protection up to 450 degrees Fahrenheit (Aerosol)

 

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JOICO – SmoothCure Thermal Styling Protectant – a humidity resistant formula that offers up to 3 days of frizz free performance. Formulated for curly, coarse hair. *also protects that hair against the heat of a blow dryer.

 

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GOLDWELL – Sleek Perfection – a humidity resistant formula that offers frizz free, sleek results for up to 24 hours.

 

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BAIN de TERRE – Magnolia Thermal Iron Protector – Humidity resistant and adds shine – (Aerosol)

Some other FAB! flat Iron sprays;

KMS – Free Shape Hot Flex Spray (formally Flat Out)  – Humidity resistant

 

PAUL MITCHELL – Hot off the press – helps to strengthen the hair and reduce frizz – (Aerosol)

AG – Firewall – the newest addition to the AG family – (Aerosol)

Your hair is not made of  Teflon, protect it, nurture it, it’ll make you feel beautiful, I promise you.