Beauty, communication, health and wellness, Uncategorized

A Bluming notion…

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I woke this morning, smiled and cheered “hello” to my teenage daughter, grabbed my cup of  joe and my new smartphone and sat down to hear one of my new favorite sounds, a whistle. (my choice of notification notice). I open up my new found twitter account to see some tweets about Judy Blume and all of a sudden I am flooded with childhood memories. Sitting on my butterfly quilt reading “Otherwise known as Sheila the Great” realizing that I too was normal. Reading “Starring Sally J. Freedman as herself” and imaging I was Sally and wondering what it must be like to be her. Sitting in the living room of the house we were about to move from reading “Are you there God? It’s me Margaret” realizing I wasn’t alone and turning 13 was gonna be okay. Being 16 and working on my tan in the backyard reading “Forever” and all the while I was reading it couldn’t believe it was my mother who gave it to me.

As all these memories flooded my mind I came to realize I need to thank Judy Blume. Her books were my friends, they were there no matter what, I could go back to them whenever I needed them, without judgement. You see, she helped me feel normal as I was growing up. I came to realize that I was like some of her character’s and people thought her character’s were pretty and funny and intelligent so that means I must be also. Among others who will be mentioned when the need arises, Judy Blume  helped this woman feel pretty and normal as she was growing up. (I know…quite the “lightbulb” moment while on my first cup of coffee at 6 a.m.).

I am telling this tale today in hopes that it will rekindle the love of yourself (and of reading) and everything that is beautiful about yourself. We all have the younger version of ourselves tucked away and stored in a closet or drawer (I don’t  know how you decorate your house of memories…mine is an old Victorian cottage) and it is time to bring them out into the sun. It is time to remember who we were in our youth – that is who we really are – you know – before the world got at us and tried to tell us who we were and what we should be.

Today, have fun. Laugh. Be who you want to be. I’ll be busy re introducing myself to me and getting my daughter my stash of Judy Blume books.

Beauty, Business, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized

Confessions of a bottle blonde

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I have to come clean about something. I know you have no idea what I look like …I’m fabulous by the way ;-), I have to be honest and tell you I am not a natural blonde. Well, I was born blonde but then became a brunette. Anyway, since I pride myself on honesty and integrity I thought it was time to come clean about my golden locks. I went blonde because I am over 65% grey. Yep, 65 whoppin’ percent. Been that way for over 6 years now. Going blonde was great because when the grey’s pop through they look blonde.

I have to admit, when I was a brunette I made fun of blondes, mostly because my sister is a blonde and when we were growing up she was all blonde and blue eyes and a great ballet dancer and slim. I was the tomboy who beat up the bullies and could throw a perfect spiral. (Football term). Anyway, getting back to the tale at hand, I used to hate the phrase “blondes have more fun” – but I have to admit, that  statement is true. The first week I was blonde, a man ran up to the door of the coffee shop to hold it open for me. Whenever I make a mistake, people just smile at me – when I was a brunette they always seemed disappointed at my mistake. I have a boisterous laugh and when I was a brunette people looked annoyed, now they seem to laugh along with me. My bottled blonde has become my secret weapon – well not so secret now since I just told you about it. (See…..you are laughing – if I was a brunette, I don’t think you would laugh as much). You see, people see a blonde and think “dumb”. It’s true, you know it. I love the fact people presume I am dumb, it makes it all the more fun for me when the realize I am intelligent, articulate, professional and capable of taking on anything thrown at me and they feel like an ass.

For all you blondes out there, natural or bottled, here are a few terrific professional salon products made just for us;

SOMA – Blonde/Silver Shampoo – the ONLY purple shampoo that eliminates the brassy tones all the while retaining the moisture and strength of our lovely locks by adding protein to their product & protects from sun damage

KMS – Color Vitality for Blondes – A shampoo and conditioner that eliminates the brassy tones.

REDKEN – Blond Glam – a complete line made just for blondes – Shampoo, conditioner, shine treatments and color depositing gel-cream treatment for at home use between salon visits for that extra boost to your blonde

AG – Sterling Silver – A purple toning shampoo and conditioner to eliminate the brassy tones.

Moroccanoil Light – Same as the original Moroccanoil treatment, created for finer hair but many have found that they get less of the brassy buildup on blonde hair when they use the Light as opposed to the original.

Blondes may not always seem the brightest, we may not get all the jokes…beware…just because we are blonde doesn’t mean we are dumb…be careful how you treat us or the joke may be on you.

 

Beauty, Business, communication, Fashion, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized

The jig is up

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I’m going to let you in on a little secret and I hope I am forgiven. Men have hair issues too. I’m not talking about back hair or south of the border over growth – that is another tale for another day. I am talking about their lovely locks or lack there of on top of their heads.

I have found there are two types of men looking for hair products or answers to their personal hair dilemma. Type 1 – struts into the store, sunglasses on, shirt open, always using the same opening line “Got anything to make me more beautiful?” as they rub some part of their body. (do they get a handbook in the high school locker room?). Type 2 – won’t make eye contact, doesn’t want help, wanders around the store until he wanders up to the counter, leans on his elbow and asks out of the corner of his mouth “what do you have for men in here?” (like we are in a high tense spy movie and he’s about to drop the secret briefcase).

Now, something to remember, men are as sensitive if not more than women when it comes to their hair – only one other asset has greater importance. Yeah, I said it. An unfortunate fact is most men will suffer from hair loss or a receding hair line. Think about it for a minute – when women are little girls – they look at their mother and get to see the killer heels they will one day wear and the great accessories and they will get to have great hair and highlites. When men are little boys – they look at their father and get to see a receding hair line or Mr. Clean. Sure they also see the strength and the great car their Dad drives – but the hair loss is always in the picture and always in the back of their minds. It is a genuine fear for most men that they will lose their hair, and rightfully so – come on ladies – you know you freak out if you see more than one strand of hair in your brush.

Another tidbit of info. – ladies – you know when we look at magazines or actresses up on the silver screen and judge our figures accordingly? Guess what – when men are looking at magazines or the actor up on the silver screen – they do it too – they just don’t show it. We as women are fortunate as we are allowed to voice these fears and insecurities – men are not – at least not in public.

A little list of professional hair care lines for our gents –

MITCH – Paul Mitchell – a little line – Shampoo, Conditioner, body wash, pomades and gels – the newest addition to the Paul Mitchell family

American Crew – Shampoo’s & Conditioners for all hair types – thick, grey, dry, oily. An array of styling products and a beautiful Shave line and Classic fragrance. – the smell makes a woman think of Brad Pitt, Bruce Willis, take your pick.

Quantum – The Fix Gel in this line is awesome.

FixMen – another little line that is not well known but terrific. Has an array of styling products with a matte finish (* most guys don’t want the shine).

Be kind – as I have stated in blogs before – do not make fun of a man’s hair – EVER. It is cruel – plain and simple. Try to remember that the men in our lives are not just men, they are human beings with fears and insecurities. Treat them as you want to be treated. ( oh – another little secret….if they bring home a gold bikini and brown bun hair pieces for you – don’t be afraid, don’t question it…it’s a guy/star wars/ princess Leia thing).

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Bring it on

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We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. – Joseph Campbell

Today’s tale is more of a personal decree. I am hoping today’s tale may help at least one more person out there to have a better day today and even a better day tomorrow.

In recent weeks I have found myself bombarded with negativity. Be it from clients, customers, friends, even squirrels – yes, I have a squirrel that sits in my driveway attempting to play chicken with my car with a “oh you think” glint in his eye. I have had nasty comments made about my hair, my marriage, my life in general. To this I say – BRING IT ON! You see, I am breaking the mold that others had created and people don’t seem to like that. I am now living my life the way I want to live it and in a way that is best for me and in turn for my family.

There was a time that I would have let all this negativity control me, detour me off the path I am supposed to be on. No more. I have come to realize that when someone is happy with their life and improving themselves, most people will try to push you down, hold you back or be generally nasty to you – and that’s ok. Most of the time they are afraid that if you move forward, they will be left behind. If you improve in any aspect of your life, they will be left feeling inadequate. If you have great hair, no one will look at them. If you behave, their rudeness will be seen.

That being said, there are many of us out there like myself that are truly happy for any achievement you may have, be it losing that last 5 pounds, getting the promotion, finally learning how not to get the round brush caught in your hair (something I have yet to master.). When you feel like the world is going crazy, when you feel as though you are being kicked in the teeth or punched in the stomach, when people, even your loved ones mock what it is you are trying to do – stay true to the path you are on, keep on keepin’ on. It’s gonna be hard, even lonely at times, that’s how you know you are doing the right thing and on the right path. When the goin’ gets tough, the tough get goin’. My Dad was right. Again.

 

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Be excellent to each other

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There I was, restocking the shelves, humming along to Adele, imagining us as the best of friends when I heard the all too familiar door chime. I turn to the door, smiling, “Hello there, how ya doin’ today?” to which I get silence. She saw me, I know. She looked right through me actually. So, I wander over to her and ask if I can give her a hand, to which she snarls “What did you say?!?!”. So I clarify I was just asking if she needed a hand finding what she needed or if I could be of any assistance. “Well, are you a hairdresser?” She asks. “No, I am not. I do know all the product lines and have been to many classes so I am sure I can help you today.” I say with my mega watt smile. “Pfft…doubt it” she states. CHALLENGE! is all that resonates in my mind.

Before I finish today’s tale, which I come out looking fabulous as always, I must tell you all something. I cannot stress this point enough. STOP BEING NASTY. Just stop. You look like an ass, you really do. If you get your kicks picking on sales people and stylists, there is a variety of medications to help you.

Since I want to enlighten and educate, I have compiled a little list. It is not the sales person/stylist fault if ;

– your husband is having an affair

– you chipped your nails

– you bought crappy product from the drug store and now people think you are auditioning for the part of the scarecrow from the land of Oz

– you hate your life

– your underwear is riding up

– the last salesperson didn’t help you

– your car has a flat tire

I could go on and on, I think you get the picture. Back to today’s tale. So, as the women stood there, her hand on her hip, smirking with pride at her go to grade nine back of the school picking on the nerdy boy phrase, I smiled and told her “I may not be a licensed stylist, but I know more than the majority of  stylists out there about product, since I sell over 30 lines and have been in the biz over 10 years, so why don’t you tell me what your “hair” issue is and we can go from there.” She just stood there, gaping, quite upset I am sure that I didn’t get nasty  or cry. She wanted a fight, but she wasn’t gonna get one. Long story short, she was coming out of a breakup and she didn’t know how to do her hair. She had just gotten a cute cut but the stylist didn’t show her how to do it, or tell her what product to use. So that’s when I said “I can fix this. I can help you to do your hair.”.  I found her the product she needed and as I rang through her purchase, she apologized. I told her it was alright, that I have had worse things said to me. I told her I was happy to help her. I did ask her to try to be nicer to the next person she spoke to. She just stared at me. I explained I meant no disrespect, but that she was lucky she ran into me because there are many people out there that would not have been so kind.

In the immortal word of Bill & Ted – “be excellent to each other”.

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Paging Dr. Ruth…

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In these days of Shades of Grey, I feel I must speak about our relationships with our significant other. EVERYDAY, in the salon I hear of someone’s romance woes. How their husband doesn’t pay them enough attention, or that their boyfriend keeps doing the wrong thing, or may all time favorite “we haven’t been intimate in months”. (sometimes I cannot help but wonder if the third complaint listed is not a direct result of the first two.). Now, If you are single, I get it, it is hard for the singles out there. There are a lot of crazies and it seems as though everyone has enough baggage to fill a 747. For those of us in a relationship/marriage, I believe we can be the crazies bringing more baggage into the relationship than we had when it began.

Ladies, and I say ladies because in all honesty we are usually the ones that turn nothing into something. Come on now, lets be honest, we have all been her. You can blame your boss, the kids, PMS, whatever – you know you have done it, started an argument for no real reason. Ladies, it is time to take a breath. Again, a deeper breath this time. Now that I have your attention, listen carefully….It is not your husband’s/boyfriend’s/partner’s job to keep you happy and satisfied – in all areas. Yeah, I said it. Yes, we deserve kindness, honesty, respect and love – everyone does. That being said, it is your responsibility and yours alone to achieve satisfaction and happiness – in all areas (nudge,nudge, wink, wink). It is uncalled for and unfair to expect another human being to make you happy when you are not happy with yourself. It is just plain mean to complain that your significant other doesn’t satisfy your needs when you have never told them what those needs are…come on, even Christian Grey had to ask Miss. Steele what she wanted.

Men are simple creatures – no offense or disrespect implied. All they want is a little peace and quiet, a good sandwich, a little lovin’ and a big T.V.. Oh and just so you know, and your children will someday know -when it come’s to the “bow chica wow wow” they don’t care if your roots are showing, they don’t care if you gained weight, all they care about it that they have a woman in front of them who they love and they get to touch her, plain and simple.

I know, you are thinking “this is supposed to be a blog about beauty” – well this is an important part of beauty. It does not matter how pretty the present is wrapped if the box is empty. It is time to be accountable to ourselves, about ourselves. It is time to be kinder and gentler to ourselves and those we love. It is time to stop having everyone else’s arguments, or blaming our significant other that our lives aren’t what we planned – it is not their fault you are unhappy – Yeah, I said it! It’s true. We teach people how to treat us, so go out there and educate those you love, you may find you learn a little something along the way.

Beauty, Business, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized

Tales of truth…part 3

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I am sure you have heard of the “zombie apocalypse” ….well, I believe it has begun. There I was, talking with a customer, explaining to her how she was going to LOVE the Kpak Revitaluxe (you all know how much I love it) and I hear the door chime behind me. I excuse myself for a moment to greet the newest arrival, smile and say “good morning” to which I hear “ughk”. I kid you not. The woman I was helping gasped and looked at me with the “what the hell?!?” look in her eyes. I leaned over and whispered “it’s okay, welcome to my world.” to which she giggled and relaxed. I walked her up to the counter, looking over at the woman (zombie) and told her I would be right with her, to which I got the blank stare and a mumbled statement which I hoped didn’t translate to “I’m gonna eat your face”. My lovely lady paid for her purchase and looked a little worried, I told her I was fine and to enjoy her day, she left the store walking the long way around to the door. (you see, thanks to my glorious hubby, I have seen Zombieland, I am prepared, I know what to do.). Back to the tale at hand. I walked ever so cautiously to the woman and asked what she needed help with….she just looked at me. About 30 seconds went by and she finally said “I need peroxide”. Whew….speech… No need for shovels today.

It was a beautiful summer day in 2011, a day I will remember for as long as I live, or until dementia sets in (family trait). A women in her late 40’s or early 50’s came into the shop, dressed in a beautiful designer summer dress with the cutest sandals to match, clutching her Coach summer tote. I asked if she needed a hand finding anything, “just looking for the nail polish” she innocently responded. I showed her our collections and went to answer the phone. After my phone call I turn around to see this women sitting on the floor, tongue sticking out the corner of her mouth and putting nail polish on her toes. The first thing that sprang to mind was the childhood rhyme “I see London…I see France…I can see your underpants”. I kindly walked up to her and said “Oh honey, first, you can’t try on the polishes, second, we can see up your dress”. I still can’t bring myself to buy pink underwear…enough said.

Last but certainly not least… I know people are lonely and in this age of technology many people email or text, so there isn’t much human interaction. I love to help all the ladies and gents that come into the store to look beautiful and feel good about themselves. That being said, I don’t really need to know everything about them. I don’t need to know about your latest gynecological finding, don’t really need to see your fungal infection on your toe nail, don’t need to see the oozing bumps on your body, don’t need to be shown your body hair on places I didn’t know hair could grow. I will gladly look at your baby pictures, not their dirty diaper. I will be a shoulder if you have lost a loved one, don’t need to hear about the embalming process. Oh, and please…don’t flash me your bikini line asking me “what is this?” and don’t throw a flat iron.

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Permission granted

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This tale is for all the women out there that are afraid of their voice. You know who you are. At some point we have all been her. You know the one…the one who keeps her opinions to herself , the one who doesn’t speak her mind, the one who goes along with everything out of fear of rocking the boat. The one who still speaks in a cutesy high pitched voice. The one who hates her hair cut so much she cries on her way home from the Salon but won’t tell her stylist because it might hurt their feelings or the stylist won’t like them anymore.  I know, we have heard all our lives, “be the good girl”, “just smile and be polite”, “boys don’t like girls who talk too much”, “the stylist knows best”. I have come to realize, all these lessons were taught to us out of fear. Our parents, teachers,mentors (take your pick) only knew fear, so that is what the majority of girls were taught, fear. Fear of what may happen if you speak your mind, fear of what may happen if you choose not to go with the flow, fear of being alone. As Maya Angelou says “when you know better, you do better”. Ladies, (and gents), it is time to “do better”.

Every day, I mean EVERYDAY, a woman will come into the shop or the salon, her eyes at the floor, mumbling a request. I make it my personal mission in life to raise these people up. I ask them what they need, what they are looking for and I always get the same response “I don’t know, what do you think?”. In turn I answer “I think you should have pink hair”…and then I give a gentle friendly giggle and tell her I want to help her feel better about her hair. I ask her what picture she has in her head of what she wants her hair to look like. 9 out of 10 women tell me they don’t like the style they have now, that their stylist doesn’t listen to them and that they hate the color of their hair. This is when I tell them “it is time to find your voice”. I reassure them, the world will not open up and swallow them whole if they speak their mind. That if they are able to yell at the girl at the drive thru for getting their coffee order wrong, I think they can talk to their stylist about what they want.

As women, we worry about what people are thinking about us or saying about us. It is time to stop worrying. As my Dad often says “worry is a debt that never comes due”. He’s right. People are going to talk no matter what, it’s what they do. Live the life you want, have the hair style and color you want, wear the clothes you like. Find your voice, embrace it, walk with your head held high, make eye contact. If you are still a little worried you are going to hurt someone’s feelings – get them a present – buy them “knitting for dummies” and tell them “here is your new hobby.”.

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Tales of truth….part 2

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The sun was shining, a cool breeze was in the air, I was enjoying a moment of my life with my flavored coffee when I heard the chirp of the door chime. The customer makes a b – line to the front counter, I smile, greet her “good morning!” to which she replies “uh huh – sure it is.”  I bid adieu to my french vanilla daydream and focus on the moment at hand. “What can I help you with?” I ask (still smiling). “This P.O.S. flat iron stopped working! It’s not heating up! I couldn’t leave my house because of my hair!”. I look at the receipt, the date is under the year expiry of in store exchange, so I look up at her, smiling and tell her “no worries, the flat iron is still under warranty, please go choose a new one.”. This is where it gets good. You would think that service with a smile and getting a new product would be a good thing. Guess not. She was looking for a fight, and she was mad she wasn’t getting one. She proceeded to pout, tug at her hair, all the while exclaiming “Look at it! Look at my hair! What am I gonna do?”. Which I responded, smiling of course (that really drives ’em crazy) “You can choose a new one, a different model if you like, if there is a price difference you just pay the difference owing.”. Then the staring contest began. Ladies and gents – tell your friends…staring contests are meant for the schoolyard, they will not get you a better deal or a free product. Anyways, it is rude to stare. In the end, she stomped over to the shelf, chose her flat iron and refused to speak to me from there on out. Funny thing was – she thought she had one over on me – I was happy it was quiet.

From time to time, you may come into a store and the product you are looking for is out of stock. I know how irritating that is, I am a consumer too. A word of advice – unless you are under the age of five, you should not start to cry because the product is not there. Nor should you yell or stomp or pout. Ladies, please, I know how important hair spray is and I know how much we love our products and we all have our favorites – keep it together ok? At least once a week I have a women over the age of thirty pitching a fit over missing product. Even when I reassure her it is coming the next day and show them the order to prove it – tearfest 2012 ensues.

In my years in this biz, I have come to realize and am in total agreement with Tabatha Coffey – It’s not really about the hair. The anger, the pouts, the tears….always something else going on and the only power the client feels they have that day is being able to pick a fight with a salesperson. So for all you out there in customer service – try not to take it personally. For those of you that are the consumer – try be polite and mind your manners…and quit staring.

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You can’t handle the truth

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Everyday, I am asked questions. Everyday, I try to answer them as honestly as I know how. I may be a manager but I am also a consumer. As a consumer, I want to know as much as I can about a purchase and I want the truth when I ask about my purchase. So, I assumed everyone would want all the information, the truth, an honest answer. My father always told me I hold my expectations of the average person too high…it took me 39 years to realize he is right. This past week has had many examples of people who, as Colonel Jessop stated, can’t handle the truth.

– A client had jet black hair and wanted to be blonde, that day. Not possible. We explained to keep her hair from breaking off or turning to wet sludge it would take a few processes,that because of the box dye she had used there was some color build up. We told her what products to use to repair the damage she had and to get her hair in better condition to begin the lightening process – even gave her some samples. After the pouting stopped, the angry tirade began….I was accused of not knowing what I was talking about and that I was somehow holding out information so that she couldn’t get what she wanted. (I really gotta get some business cards from a local shrink – cross promote our services).

– A client looking for toner. Again, I cannot stress enough, toner is not a magic liquid that comes in a magic bottle. It can be any color. It can process within seconds of being on your hair. If you are not careful it can make a blonde go orange, gold, purple or silver. Please, share this tidbit with all of your friends….toner is not a magic potion. If you are looking for toner in a container labelled “toner” – go to Staples. Otherwise – see your stylist.

– Our hair grows. Everyday. Some people’s faster than others. That is why you will get a different color of hair at your roots and hair line. It is called regrowth. No, hair color does not go into the scalp so your hair grows out that color. No, there is not a product that stops that. Even in death your hair grows.(yeah…I said it). If you don’t like the signs of regrowth, try high and low lights – that way your roots aren’t as noticeable.

– A client wanted volume in her hair but didn’t want to use product. I told her that to achieve the volume and the look she wanted, she would need a little bit of product and if she used a blow dryer it would help too. I was told that if I cared about the environment I wouldn’t use a hair dryer. She stormed out and got into her Hummer. (I kid you not).

– A mother came in with her daughter looking for hot pink hair dye. I explained that we don’t sell it, because the vibrant hair color dye is not allowed to be sold to the public. We don’t carry it because we are a retailer, not a wholesaler. Again, big surprise, I was yelled at…told I was unfair and that I made no sense and should not discriminate against the public. I gave her the toll free number of the company that supplies color to LICENSED stylists and told her she should call them. As she stormed out calling me stupid I thought about what a wonderful example she was setting for her daughter….and I swear I heard a banjo playing.

This week will be a fun filled week for my readers. I was told all my life to be honest and tell the truth, so this week that is exactly what you will get, the truth. So hold on my friends. Hold on.