health and wellness, lifestyle

Kindness 101

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I sat down to write about products today and as I began to write I realized, nope. That’s not what today’s tale is going to be about. Today’s tale is about kindness. You see, I know you are expecting funny tales of my daily escapades in my shop or tales of products and how to use them. Today I feel I must write about kindness. You see I believe that kindness is a HUGE factor in beauty, be it physical beauty or spiritual beauty.

When I speak of kindness, I don’t mean holding the door open for an elderly person – that is called courtesy, I don’t mean avoid name calling – that is called having manners. I am speaking of kindness – truly listening to the person who is speaking to you, being happy for them and their achievements, how ever trivial you may think they are. Lifting someone’s spirit’s up – not pushing them down to where it makes you feel comfortable. Honestly, everyday I see or hear people choosing to be unkind and it stills astonishes me. Yep, I’m going to be 40 in a few weeks and I still don’t understand why anyone over the age of 12 chooses to be mean or chooses to belittle the dreams of others.

At least once a week I meet a woman who has changed her cut or color and loved it just to have her husband or best friend tell her it is a disaster or a huge mistake. While I help them wipe away their tears (yes…9 out of 10 times they are crying), I ask them “Do you like your hair?” and they say “Yes, but…” and before I let her finish, I tell her, “If you like it, who cares what they think anyway? If you are happy with your new look, that is what is important. You must do what you like, because in the wee small hours of the morning, it is you and you alone with yourself and your thoughts. People are gonna talk anyways, why not really give ’em something to talk about?”. Then we laugh together, and I help her find a product to help keep her new look going, or sometimes I just give her a hug and a tissue and tell her “they need our sympathy, you can’t fix stupid”.

Not to sound all hippie, gonna “buy the world a coke” kind of thing, I want you to try something. Next time you hear someone excited about something, be excited with them. I don’t care if they are excited because they found a dollar on the street or their child just got into Harvard or they finally had the guts for fire engine red streaks put through their hair. Whatever it is, it means something to that person and who are you or I to take that happiness away from them? If we can be happy for a child who has just found a nickel and thinks they are rich and we can join in their enthusiasm, why not be happy for someone who has a dream and has the guts to chase after it? We have all been there, so happy and excited over something and somebody comes along and dumps on it. Being cruel and unkind is ugly, not one ounce of beauty in that kind of behavior.

Be happy for others. Just be happy for them. It’s really that simple.

Beauty, Business, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized

Tales of truth…part 4

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So, we are havin’ a heat wave…a tropical heat wave….Seriously though, it has been a little warmer than usual and we have a full moon upon us, so I thought I was prepared for what may walk through my shop door. Guess I should have been a boy scout.

I hear the chirp of the door chime and look up to see a woman with desperation in her eyes. “I need extensions!Do you have any?” as her lip trembles. I assume she must have an occasion or special event that she is running late for. I take her back to our selection of Human Hair extensions, let her know they already have the clips attached so all she has to do is style them and clip them in…Voila! She is set. Then I am asked something I have never been asked before. “How sturdy are these extensions?” she asks. I had to take a moment because my mind took the first off ramp to the gutter, then I matured a bit and collected my thoughts and I told her that she should take them out at night so that they don’t get knotted up. To which she responded “No, I need to know if they can be pulled out…I am a “dancer”.” (So I guess she did have an occasion she was late for.). So, I told her “just tell them hands off your hair”. I bet Magic Mike never had these worries.

I was yelled at because I didn’t have “you know..that shampoo that used to be in a white bottle”.

I have a customer I see on a weekly basis. She comes in with the same complaint every week. She “hates her hair” and “it doesn’t do a thing she wants”, “it’s always all over the place” (like her thoughts I can safely assume). The problem you see is this…she will not use any styling products. She doesn’t like the way they feel in her hands. Yep…seriously, doesn’t like how they feel in her hands. I told her “trying to do your hair without product is like icing a cake before you bake it.”. She just looks at me. Good thing she married rich.

The phone rings. My part time girl (my p.t.g.) answers with our happy go to greeting. On the other end she hears a woman who has the nicest voice ask if she could get in for an appointment in the Salon. We check the book and unfortunately all my stylists are fully booked for the next week, not even time for a cut, so my p.t.g. gets back to her and apologizes that we don’t have time this week but the girls have time next week. Her name must have been Sybil because the nice lady went away and we were now listening to a woman yell “I need my F#$!in’ hair done now!!!”. Oh yeah, that’s a great way to get an appointment.

A well dressed woman walked into the shop. I asked her if she needed a hand, to which she said she was “just looking”. I turn to check the invoice of the order that just arrived and I hear “SSSTTTTT”. I turn to see her using a hairspray from the shelf, put the lid back on, and put it back on the shelf. She was about to walk out and I asked her if she was going to buy the hairspray, to which she said “What hairspray?”. Yep, I kid you not. So I say “the hairspray you just used” as I am reaching for the can in question. She looks at me and says “I didn’t use that!”. (are you kidding me?!?! Seriously lady!”). So, I had to say, “Well you did. I saw you and by the way, your hair is still wet from where you sprayed it. You will have to buy it, it was not a tester.”. She actually touched her hair, felt that I was correct, her hair was wet and bought the hairspray.

The temperature is supposed to reach 38 degrees (100.4 F), so I can’t wait to see what comes through the door today.

 

Beauty, communication, health and wellness, Uncategorized

Bring it on

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We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. – Joseph Campbell

Today’s tale is more of a personal decree. I am hoping today’s tale may help at least one more person out there to have a better day today and even a better day tomorrow.

In recent weeks I have found myself bombarded with negativity. Be it from clients, customers, friends, even squirrels – yes, I have a squirrel that sits in my driveway attempting to play chicken with my car with a “oh you think” glint in his eye. I have had nasty comments made about my hair, my marriage, my life in general. To this I say – BRING IT ON! You see, I am breaking the mold that others had created and people don’t seem to like that. I am now living my life the way I want to live it and in a way that is best for me and in turn for my family.

There was a time that I would have let all this negativity control me, detour me off the path I am supposed to be on. No more. I have come to realize that when someone is happy with their life and improving themselves, most people will try to push you down, hold you back or be generally nasty to you – and that’s ok. Most of the time they are afraid that if you move forward, they will be left behind. If you improve in any aspect of your life, they will be left feeling inadequate. If you have great hair, no one will look at them. If you behave, their rudeness will be seen.

That being said, there are many of us out there like myself that are truly happy for any achievement you may have, be it losing that last 5 pounds, getting the promotion, finally learning how not to get the round brush caught in your hair (something I have yet to master.). When you feel like the world is going crazy, when you feel as though you are being kicked in the teeth or punched in the stomach, when people, even your loved ones mock what it is you are trying to do – stay true to the path you are on, keep on keepin’ on. It’s gonna be hard, even lonely at times, that’s how you know you are doing the right thing and on the right path. When the goin’ gets tough, the tough get goin’. My Dad was right. Again.

 

Beauty, Business, communication, Hair Care, Uncategorized

You can’t handle the truth

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Everyday, I am asked questions. Everyday, I try to answer them as honestly as I know how. I may be a manager but I am also a consumer. As a consumer, I want to know as much as I can about a purchase and I want the truth when I ask about my purchase. So, I assumed everyone would want all the information, the truth, an honest answer. My father always told me I hold my expectations of the average person too high…it took me 39 years to realize he is right. This past week has had many examples of people who, as Colonel Jessop stated, can’t handle the truth.

– A client had jet black hair and wanted to be blonde, that day. Not possible. We explained to keep her hair from breaking off or turning to wet sludge it would take a few processes,that because of the box dye she had used there was some color build up. We told her what products to use to repair the damage she had and to get her hair in better condition to begin the lightening process – even gave her some samples. After the pouting stopped, the angry tirade began….I was accused of not knowing what I was talking about and that I was somehow holding out information so that she couldn’t get what she wanted. (I really gotta get some business cards from a local shrink – cross promote our services).

– A client looking for toner. Again, I cannot stress enough, toner is not a magic liquid that comes in a magic bottle. It can be any color. It can process within seconds of being on your hair. If you are not careful it can make a blonde go orange, gold, purple or silver. Please, share this tidbit with all of your friends….toner is not a magic potion. If you are looking for toner in a container labelled “toner” – go to Staples. Otherwise – see your stylist.

– Our hair grows. Everyday. Some people’s faster than others. That is why you will get a different color of hair at your roots and hair line. It is called regrowth. No, hair color does not go into the scalp so your hair grows out that color. No, there is not a product that stops that. Even in death your hair grows.(yeah…I said it). If you don’t like the signs of regrowth, try high and low lights – that way your roots aren’t as noticeable.

– A client wanted volume in her hair but didn’t want to use product. I told her that to achieve the volume and the look she wanted, she would need a little bit of product and if she used a blow dryer it would help too. I was told that if I cared about the environment I wouldn’t use a hair dryer. She stormed out and got into her Hummer. (I kid you not).

– A mother came in with her daughter looking for hot pink hair dye. I explained that we don’t sell it, because the vibrant hair color dye is not allowed to be sold to the public. We don’t carry it because we are a retailer, not a wholesaler. Again, big surprise, I was yelled at…told I was unfair and that I made no sense and should not discriminate against the public. I gave her the toll free number of the company that supplies color to LICENSED stylists and told her she should call them. As she stormed out calling me stupid I thought about what a wonderful example she was setting for her daughter….and I swear I heard a banjo playing.

This week will be a fun filled week for my readers. I was told all my life to be honest and tell the truth, so this week that is exactly what you will get, the truth. So hold on my friends. Hold on.

Beauty, Business, communication, Hair Care

Just looking…..

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Picture this scenario. The sun is shining. It is a beautiful day. A customer walks through the door. A sales girl greets the customer with a cheery “Good Morning!” (yes….it’s true, customer service does exist, it is not an urban legend). The sales girl is greeted back with “I’m looking”. My all time favorite response from customers, I especially love it when accompanied with the famous “talk to the hand” motion.

Believe it or not, there are sales people that want to help you. Yes, there are commission sales people that make you feel like you are a gazelle about to be pounced on by a lion, and sometimes you cannot find a person in a smock. That being said, you should not paint us all with the same brush. I, as well as many other sales people get paid if you buy or not. I really just want to help you find what you need, or even help you use what you have correctly. Would you like it if a salesperson assumed you were nasty because you have a black leather jacket since the last customer wearing a black leather jacket was less than kind? Didn’t think so. Sounds pretty stupid actually, don’t you think?

Here is a little check list for you all. Trust me, your shopping/salon experience with be most pleasurable for all parties involved.

– When greeted with a good morning/good afternoon, remember what your Mommy taught you – say good morning/good afternoon back

– Unless you were asked what your name is and your name is “I’m looking”  that phrase just doesn’t make sense as a response. Don’t feel like chatting, smile at the sales person and politely say (after greeting), “I would like to peek around and can I get you if I need you?” – See, how lovely is that. You get your way and the salesperson is treated as well as they are trying to treat you.

– Make eye contact when speaking to a salesperson/stylist. We are all human beings. Yes, we are service provider’s – we are not servants.

– Please do not walk up to the counter, interrupt our greeting, refuse eye contact and say “get me my hairspray”. That is rude, plain and simple.

– Please and Thank You. Two little phrases that mean so much.

– Do not throw the Flat Iron

* A little treasure tidbit for you – we are trained to watch for theft. When you refuse to make eye contact and try to manoeuvre like a ninja through the store, you ARE gonna get our attention – because you are lookin’ a little kooky.

So, lets recap. Say Hello, be polite, don’t throw the flat iron – or any product for that matter – including throwing your weight around.

 

Beauty, communication, Hair Care, Uncategorized

Mind your manners…

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“Mind your manners”. Remember that phrase? I know you all remember where the beef is and not to squeeze the Charmin. Whatever happened to remembering to mind your manners? Today’s tale is for all the hair stylists and esthetician’s out there, to shed some light on what they have to deal with on a weekly and sometimes even on a daily basis. Yes, they offer a service, that does not mean they are your servant.  Salon etiquette exists – it is not an urban legend. When visiting your doctor’s office or your dentist, I am sure you don’t throw your purse on the ground or interrupt them when they are with another patient. The same goes for the Salon. If your stylist is with another client, remember what your kindergarten teacher said, wait your turn. As for throwing your purse on the ground, come on, do I really have to explain?

The following is a list I have compiled that should help make your next Salon visit pleasurable for all parties involved;

– Brush your teeth. You would think it was common sense. Well, common sense ain’t so common.

– Brush your hair. No one wants to see a hair ball at the Salon.

– Coming for a pedicure? Wash your feet. Even the Savior himself wouldn’t want to wash some of the feet that walk through the Salon door.

– If you are sick, re-book your appointment. Salon’s are to spread happiness and self esteem, not the plague.

– When offered a beverage, say please and thank you, or no thank you – which ever works. “Nah” with a hand wave…not so nice.

– When asked what you want done with your hair, try to refrain from “whatever” or “I’m texting”…again… not so nice.

– Want a spray cut? Please make sure your hair is clean. Imagine the smell of old mop water. Enough said.

– When your child is with you, be the parent. It is a little difficult to babysit while applying foil highlights or nail art to your fresh pedi.

– When you make an appointment and cannot keep it – call the Salon. Not only is a “no show” rude, it takes an appointment away from another client. Most importantly it affects the stylist/esthetician’s income for that day.

It’s pretty simple. Be nice. Be polite. Treat other’s as you want to be treated. Remember to mind your manners. If you need to, imagine your mother slapping you on the back of the head.

 

 

Beauty, Business, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized

Goldilocks had a hard time finding the perfect chair too

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On this beautiful Sunday, I have been recalling many a tale. Tales of hair woes, mine and yours. Everyday I am immersed into a complete strangers pool of uncertainty. Uncertain if I am trustworthy to speak of their hair. “Does she know of what she speaks? She isn’t a hairdresser, she looks normal and her hair is nice but I have seen this before….hmm.”.  I know that is what these strangers are thinking and I am okay with that. I have broad shoulders (thank you Dad for the genetics). I am here to say, in most circumstances I do know what I am talking about, and when I don’t I find out.

On a daily basis I remind women that they have a voice and they are allowed to use it. I hear their tales of discontent, of fury at their stylist for their new found pixie cut when all they wanted was a trim. The first thing I ask is “did you explain you were not happy?”. The answer is always “No, I didn’t want to hurt my stylist’s feelings”. Lets stop right there. First- not fair to the stylist – he/she doesn’t know there is a problem. They will continue to do what you do not like because they think everything is great! Second- really? You said nothing? If we are able to tell our physician’s when we are not happy, tell our dentists we fear them worse then the plague, why are we unable to tell a stylist we are not happy with the service. The good ones won’t be offended, if anything they will be upset that they may have offended you.

That said, next time you sit in a chair, awaiting the new you, listen for the consultation. You should hear from the stylist;

– What are we doing today?

– How have you been?

– Any changes since I have seen you last? (An important question – stress/medication/illness can sometimes affect your hair during chemical services)

– How do you do your hair at home? What products do you prefer?

All of these are important, as are you and your hair. If you aren’t hearing these things, you may want to look for another chair.