Beauty, Business, communication, health and wellness, That girl in the red coat, Women, writing

Man in the Mirror

In the age of equality, I feel I must write about this today. Today’s tale is for those who want to like their reflection. For those who want to turn heads. For those who want a compliment on their appearance. For those who feel insecure about the changes in their skin, their hair and their bodies. For those who are trying to find the person they once knew, who don’t recognize that person looking back at them in the mirror. Today’s tale is for all the Gents. Yes, for the Gents.

As of late I have realized two things. First, all gents want to look good. Second, when a gent wants to look good, more often than not, he is teased or cursed for it. …and this needs to stop.

I met a man last week that was concerned about his hairline. He was so embarrassed by it, he wouldn’t remove his hat. I let him know that no one else was in the shop, that he didn’t have to take off his hat, he just had to lift the front a little so I could see his hairline, then I would know what products would be best for him. As he raised his cap, his eyes went directly to the floor. I thanked him, I looked at his hairline and told him to remove his hat, since there was nothing to be worried about. He looked at me and said “…but my wife told me last night that my hairline was receding and I should just shave my head.”. It was then that I got out my Nioxin manual and showed him pictures of receding hair lines and hair loss and asked him “Do you look like that?”. He smirked and said “No.”. I explained that yes, maybe his hair line was finer than it used to be, then I told him so was mine and lifted up my bangs to show him. Finally, consistent eye contact! After a few minutes, we decided an updated cut may be the answer and applying some product in his hair to keep it in place. I told him my secret “Getting my hair to look like this…it’s all smoke and mirrors my friend. Smoke and mirrors!” to which he laughed, then thanked me for my time and my courtesy and for not making him feel silly or vain.

I am about to tell you something so that you will know, and someday your children will know…men want to like their reflection, for themselves. Men feel just as insecure as women about aging. Men want their spouses/partners to find them sexy and attractive and worry that they don’t measure up – no pun intended – get your mind out of the gutter. Men know that their hair line is changing, they do not need it pointed out. Think about it ladies…what would happen if a man pointed out your ever so slightly saggy neck. If you are going to tell a man to “just shave your head” because he is beginning to thin a tad, you better be ready for him to say “just get botox” when a line is spotted.  Those familiar with my blog know I have written of this before, see link below;

https://thatgirlintheredcoat.com/2012/11/02/receding-hairlines-and-muffin-tops/

…and from time to time, I will continue to write about this for making fun of anyone or belittling anyone who is trying to improve themselves is unkind and ugly. Plain and simple. If you want to be treated as an equal, be careful how you treat others, for you get what you give.

ThatGirlx3

 

 

Beauty, Business, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, That girl in the red coat, Uncategorized

Step away from the scissors and listen for a minute

“This is not what we discussed. Look at my hair! What am I going to do? I can’t go to work looking like this!”. – you are picturing a woman right now, aren’t you? Yes, most people picture a woman uttering these phrases when she has received a bad hair cut…and that is the first problem. Women are not the only ones that suffer from bad hair days and bad hair cuts. Our lovely gents do as well. Actually, in my experience, men seem to be the victim of bad a hair cut/style more often than women. For some reason, many stylists seem to think for their male clientele. A gentleman comes in looking for a new style and ends up walking out with the same cut his father gave him sitting in the kitchen with the #1 guide…when he was 4 years old.

As you know, I manage a retail shop/salon. I have many men come into the shop for their hair products, from KMS HAIRPLAY Molding Paste to d:fi molding cream. Some of my lovely gents like to spike up their hair with Joico Ice Spiker and some like to slick it back with American Crew Firm Gel. Some gents like a bit of shine – SOMA Prism spray is a great choice -no hold, just lovely shine, and some like a matte finish – AG STUCCO is great and a big seller. What all my lovely gents have in common is they want to look good. They want to look professional and creditable in their profession – from Welder to Physician. What they don’t want is the “Charlie Brown” head, or as mentioned above, the cut they had from dear old Dad.

Many times, unfortunately, men come into the shop asking me “Do you sell clippers?” – they ask this because they feel their only option is to shave their head because they just cannot face another bad cut, or having another stylist not listen to them when they tell them what they don’t want their hair to look like. I know, believe me, I know that clients/customers do not always explain themselves very well. It is our job, as managers, owners and stylists to take the time to be sure we understand what it is our clients/customers want. When the gentleman in your chair says he wants it short – ask him how short. Place your fingers on his head as a point of reference if need be – every stylist has had a client that when they said take a few inches off, they really meant half an inch. What the client pictures as short may not be what you, as the stylist, pictures as short. You need to clarify. You need to be clear. You need to stop thinking for your client. If you are not sure of how to cut men’s hair, or you only know 3 cuts for our gents – pick up a copy of Canadian Hairdresser, or Salon magazine or hop on Google and go to http://www.behindthechair.com and check out the images and tutorials.

Think about this for a minute, I mean really think about it – what would happen if a woman sat in your chair with shoulder length hair and said she wanted something shorter and you gave her a pixie cut, because that’s what you thought she wanted and you thought that would be best…what would happen? A meltdown of Nuclear proportions, that’s what. When a woman is sitting in your chair looking for a change or something shorter, as a stylist, you may spend up to 20 minutes on a consultation, to be sure you know exactly what it is she wants, how she styles her hair at home, what products she likes to use on her hair and what she has done with her hair in the past. I believe our Gents are worth the time as well. Men are a key component to a successful Salon and retail business – they deserve our attention.

In my 20 years of customer service and in my 10 plus years in our beloved biz of Beauty, I know one thing with absolute certainty. Women may give you a second chance. Men will not, and honestly, when they aren’t being listened to…who can blame them?

Beauty, Business, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized, Women

It was a quiet day at the shop today. It’s January and mother nature couldn’t make up her mind  which outfit to wear…Parka? Winter boots? Rubber boots? Trench coat?…so she went with all four.Today went from snow to freezing rain to rain to imminent thunderstorms. It seems that mother nature wasn’t the only one today who couldn’t make up her mind or the only one in a mood for that matter. I was going to make today’s tale another installment of the ever popular “tales of truth” series as my first few customers were so generous as to give me some awesome material, but it was the last customer I served that changed my mind. She belittled her husband. She made fun of him. She went on and on about his feet and their cracks and calluses and ended her monologue with “Hhmmppt. Men. No personal hygiene…what do you expect.”.

I am always hearing women complain about men and their lack of personal hygiene. First things first ladies, lets get one thing straight.There is a difference between personal hygiene and personal maintenance, so maybe, just maybe you need to ease up a little. Here is a little list to help clarify;

Brushing teeth = Personal hygiene. Manscaping = Personal maintenance.

Washing hair & all 2000 parts = Personal hygiene. Keeping side burns the exact shape = Personal maintenance.

Washing hands = Personal hygiene. Getting a manicure  = Personal maintenance.

The reason for today’s tale is to help out our gents. Too many of you are out right mean to the men in your lives. Yeah…I said it. I know, I know, I can hear some of you now, “She’s always sticking up for the men!”. Correction. Not to sound all “Norma  Rae”, I am standing up for beauty, in all forms , for all people. My tales may from time to time reflect the issues of our gents because in the business of beauty, they are either being neglected or ridiculed. It’s true. Think about it. How many times have you heard or said “Isn’t that cute?!?” when you hear a man has gotten a pedicure….and women wonder why men don’t keep up with their personal maintenance. If that is how you treat him, you are lucky it is only his feet he has let go.

After my customer had finished what she thought was a witty and well thought sentence, I let her know that many men come into my shop for help. I told her “They come into my shop because we make them feel comfortable. We understand that they have faced ridicule and that is not what we are about. We also know that, for the most part, men don’t know about personal maintenance because no one ever taught them.”. Then we had a staring contest, her and I. After about 10 seconds, she said “Never thought about that.”. I gave her a few samples and wrote down the instructions on how to use the products she purchased. (by the way…a foot paddle to exfoliate the callus and Gehwol Lipidro cream are an  AWESOME combination….OH! and for cracked heels the Gehwol Salve for Cracked Skin is terrific!).

Guess what?! Men, just like us, want to look good, and feel good. Just like us, they want to look desirable to their better half, be it a man or a woman. Just like us, getting a second glance from a stranger puts a spring in their step. Did you ever stop to think that maybe your gent wants to get his back waxed so he can feel comfortable walking with you hand in hand on the beach – not because he has a mistress. Sure, there are some real asses out there, it doesn’t mean that when your gent starts taking pride in his appearance he has a bit on the side – would you want him to think that of you every time you applied lipstick?

Seriously ladies. Be nice. It is really that simple. Treat your gents as you want to be treated.  As women, we are always preaching about equality. Well ladies, careful what you wish for, because if you are one of those women who mock and ridicule the men in your lives, guess what is coming your way.

Gentlemen and…ladies?