Beauty, Business, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized, Women, writing

Tales of truth – The Christmas Chronicles – Part 2

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Today is the 20th. of December. Depending on what you choose to believe, there is one day left until the end of the world or four days left to find that perfect gift. Maybe the threat of impending doom is the reason for the idiotic behavior being displayed on a daily basis…or maybe it is the worry of the turkey being too dry. Me, I gotta go with common sense ain’t that common. I am sorry to say, the following tales are real and people like this actually exist.

– “Why can’t I return this nail polish? I only used it once and I don’t like it!”. – the woman had bleeding cuticles and something that I can only hope was an ink stain on her thumb nail

– As I was ringing through my customer’s purchase and we were waiting on her debit approval she asked me if I was ready for Christmas. I told her yes to which she snapped “Must be nice. Who has time for that?!”. – guess who’s getting coal this year?

– At least ten times a day I have a customer complain that our debit machine is too slow, then once the transaction is approved they stand at the counter for another 10 minutes explaining how infuriating it is to have to wait on a “dial up” connection.

– “Why does my hairspray can feel cold when I take it out of my trunk?” – pssst….we live in Canada and it is DECEMBER.

– “I don’t read receipts or signs!” – a customers response when I told her our return policy is on every receipt and on the sign at our register…I guess hooked on phonics didn’t work for her… couldn’t help but wonder how she finds her exit on the highway.

– A woman calls the shop and asks me if her hair is too short for a weave. I tell her I need her to come by the shop so that I can see the length of her hair to which she said “I can’t get there today, so how about I describe it to you.”….sigh.

– I wished a customer a “Merry Christmas” to which I was corrected, “It’s Happy Holidays. You are being politically incorrect.”. – this coming from a woman who 5 minutes earlier complained quite loudly about “those natives always getting no tax.”. – no amount of hairspray or rouge can make ignorance pretty.

– I heard a woman tell her child to “shut up with all the damn Christmas songs already!”. When the mom was looking for her hairspray I gave the little boy a Hersey’s kiss and told him he sang beautifully. – goes to show, giving birth isn’t the only thing that makes you a mother.

– I had an elderly woman buying a gift for her granddaughter and she was trying to count out the proper change. There was a line up and the ladies behind her started to sigh and huff and puff, loud enough for her to hear. She told me her sight wasn’t the best and apologized for holding up the line to which I responded “Don’t you worry. We all need a moment to take a breath or two”, then came out from behind the counter, gave a little glare to the huffypuffy’s and helped her find the correct coins. – those other ladies aren’t on the naughty list – they are on the nasty list.

 

Feel free to share these tales with your friends, family and co workers. If you see yourself  mirrored in any of the above tales, forgive yourself and move on. Lets make common sense a little more common.

 

 

 

 

Beauty, health and wellness, Uncategorized, writing

That will leave a mark

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Today’s tale will be short but sweet…like me. It has been over a week since my last tale and I do apologize for that. Life kind of got in the way this week and tonight I was reminded of something by none other than my dear ol’ Dad. I was reminded that I should be proud of my accomplishments as he is proud of them. The “life ” that got in the way this week was my Dad has been in the hospital. It doesn’t matter why, all that matters is that he is on the mend. While visiting him this evening he was telling me how he was telling his roomies about my blog and twittering and how much I had accomplished in so little time, which in turn got one of the gentlemen to decide to take his business into the social media world.

Everything we do or say, negative or positive makes an impact, it leaves a mark. My father always makes everyone he speaks with the center of attention, helps them see things in a different light, helps them to see something from a different angle, helps them to change a negative to a positive. He makes an impact. He leaves a mark. Tomorrow, when you greet your family as they wake, when you order your coffee, when you are buying your hairspray or getting your hair done, think about your impact and the mark you want to leave.

Beauty, Business, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized, Women, writing

Tales of Truth – The Christmas Chronicles

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When my daughter was younger…(I say when she was younger – not little – little makes her sound like she was a Polly Pocket. Also, my family is vertically challenged so “little” has a wee bit of a sting), one of the Christmas songs she would sing (a lot) was “Santa Claus is Comin’ to town”. As you know, I manage a retail shop/Salon and it is the Christmas season. It seems many people have forgotten that “He sees you when you’re sleeping, he knows when you’re awake, he knows if you’ve been bad or good so be good for goodness sake.”.

– The phone rings. “Good After…” is all I got out. “Yeah Hi, where the hell is your store?” is what I hear. I give the shops location and am blessed with the response “Why couldn’t I find it in the phone book?!” and then they hung up….fa la la la la, la, la, la, la.

– We have a Christmas tree up in our Salon. It is a nice tree. At least once a day I am asked “Why do you have a tree up in the Salon” as Christmas music is playing in the background.

– A woman came in with jet black hair that she had colored at home with a box dye from the drug store. She had decided she wanted to go blonde, by herself, at home. I told her that wasn’t the best of ideas and told her the complications that may and will arise. She stared at me, flipped what was left of her hair, smacked her gum and said “It’s Christmas and this is what I want. I want to be blonde so let me buy my stuff and keep your opinions to yourself…ok?!?!”. …if she makes it to blonde it truly is a Christmas miracle.

– “You are a liar!” – what is said to me when I tell someone an item is on back order and I don’t know when it is arriving. – People, please, for the last time, I don’t work in the warehouse and am not in charge of  shipping and receiving…and seriously…I am not going to lie about a product being on back order…about your choice of hair color…maybe.

– “Can you give me the model numbers of all the flat irons you sell so I can look up their reviews on line?” – a call I get at least once a week. I sell 15 different models.

– “Will my husband like the smell of Joico shampoo more than Sebastian shampoo?”. When I answer that I don’t know I am always asked “why?”…this is why my jaw line is so firm…forcing back laughter all day keeps the jaw line nice and firm.

– A grown woman pouted and exclaimed “Come on!!! Life is so unfair! Nothing is going my way!”. Her cries of desperation were not because of a job loss or a sick loved one…her hairspray wasn’t available in a travel size and she was leaving for Europe for 3 weeks…the horror.

– “I bought this foot file and I don’t like the way it felt on my feet, I want to return it.”. The answer is no…and eewww.

– At our shop we always hold a monthly draw for a gift of free product. This month we are offering weekly draws along with our monthly draw. I am asked at least 10 times a day “What is the difference between the monthly draw and the weekly draw?”…Santa and the Baby Jesus have their work cut out for them this year.

– “Why do all the holiday packs have pictures of decorations on them?”…I really wish I was makin’ this up…I really do.

– “What does the Peppermint hand lotion smell like?”…oh how I wish I could say “Lemons”.

– “What do you mean I can’t return this comb? I only used it twice?!? I think you and your policy are stupid!!!” – after I explained I cannot re sell a USED comb

Today is Saturday on my side of the world. Saturdays and Christmas shoppers aren’t always the best of blends. Be kind out there. Be patient. I would tell you to think before you speak but I have to admit…some of the stuff we hear helps us make it through the day. Oh yes…although my first “flat iron being thrown at my head” incident was at Christmas time many years ago, it isn’t festive nor is it a tradition I wish to carry forth. So please, do not throw the flat iron.

Beauty, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized, Women, writing

It’s time to paint your own picture

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So the Christmas season is upon us. I think Mother Nature has been hitting the holiday cheer a little early this year because we are not experiencing the typical December weather we are used to in my neck of the woods. School mornings aren’t filled with “Put on your toque!” ( hat for the non-Canadians) followed with the all too familiar “BUT MOM!!! It’s gonna ruin my hair!”. Not an “appropriate” footwear argument to be heard or a pout or tantrum over ugly winter boots to be had. There may be peace and happiness in the  morning at households of school aged children everywhere, but it doesn’t seem to last. “It doesn’t feel like Christmas” is what I hear all day at the shop. After hearing it for the tenth time before 10 a.m. (we open at 9:30 a.m.), I found myself thinking about what I think Christmas is, and what I used to think Christmas was and how hard we as women are on ourselves and our image. (Hey, it’s Monday and I had 4 cups of coffee and have a teenage daughter – enough said).

When I was a child I firmly believed in Santa and the Baby Jesus. I thought they were related. I couldn’t wait to see Santa, that was until I got within 5 feet of the man and thought I was going to pee my pants because I swore he could read my mind and knew it was me who had cut my sister’s Barbie’s hair and had kicked many boys “where it counts” when they made fun of me…and he would tell the Baby Jesus. Fast forward to my twenties/early thirties. I was married when I was 22 and yes we are still together and we still love and like each other. I, as many women went through the “Norman Rockwell painting” phase. Oh come on…you know you did, hell, you may still be going through it – my condolences. The “Norman Rockwell painting” phase or NRP as I like to call it is when one puts so much pressure on one’s self to look perfect and act perfect that one does not enjoy anything and finds no beauty…anywhere. Not in their decorations, baking, family or their own reflection. I thankfully snapped out of that.  As I type, I have a tree up in my living room with lights on it and that’s about it. Why? My daughter wants to help decorate it but she has too much homework so we will do it later some time this week…and guess what?!? The moon didn’t turn black and the earth didn’t open up and swallow us whole.  Take that NRP. Now Christmas is whatever it may be. Last year it was beer and quesadillas. This year, I have no idea yet and it is glorious.

In the last week I have seen women fret and panic because the red polish they needed for an exact match to their holiday sweater set was on back order. I  heard a woman call herself an idiot because she forgot her list. I have heard women say they were too old for a new cut. I have seen a woman’s lip quiver over deciding which flat iron to get. All of them had themselves on such a tight schedule, everything had to be perfectly timed – a timer should be used for baking cookies – not for your daily life. They were all trying to make it perfect. Ladies, it is time to ease up on ourselves, it’s never gonna be perfect. Souffles will fall, cookies will burn, nail polish will chip (if you use OPI ChipSkip it won’t but that is another tale for another time).

There may not be snow, there may be stress in your life, the nail polish may be on back order but it can still feel like Christmas. Play a game with your child, laugh at their jokes even if it is the 100th time you have heard it. Hold your husband’s hand and when you ask how his day was, mean it. Smile as you pass people on the street. Give to a local charity. Donate to a toy drive. Sing a carol in your car. Text a friend to tell them they are wonderful. Talk to your parents – in their living room or at their grave – they will listen to you either way. Next thing you know…it may begin to feel like Christmas.

 

 

 

 

 

Beauty, communication, Fashion, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized, Women, writing

True Colors

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As it seems to happen, the tale I was going to tell you has changed. I was going to share a tale of product knowledge today but it seems that tale will have to wait for another day. As I was eating my Honey Nut Cheerio’s and warming up the ol’ laptop I turned on the T.V. and heard a familiar tune from my youth. The tune was “True Colors” by Cyndi Lauper but it was not my beloved Ms. Lauper singing. It was Artists Against Bullying – A beautifully selected group of Canadian artists singing an anthem from my youth. While watching the video as they displayed lyrics, thoughts and truths on white sheets of paper ( an homage to Bob Dylan) I found myself catapulted back to 1986 for the briefest of moments and remembering how I would play and rewind that song on my cassette player over and over. No matter what the year, decade or century…we all have either been bullied or felt like we would never fit in.

I know, I can hear you all now, “What does this have to do with beauty?”. The answer is EVERYTHING. When I was 14 I cut off all my hair. I loved it. It was funky. It was fun and it showed off my collection of earrings – from gold hoops to huge plastic numbers…hey, it was the 80’s. The first day I showed up at school with my new do I was welcomed with “wow…you look like a boy!”, “Why did you do that? Guys like long hair.” and my all time favorite “oh…So you are into chicks.”…and no one did anything. No one said anything to defend me. I couldn’t eat my lunch that day because I was using every ounce of my energy to keep my chin up and the tears in. (It was a good lunch, my mom had given me a chocolate bar.).  I didn’t take the bus home that day. I was terrified of what I would hear. I walked home by myself, feeling stupid, ugly and fat – because for some unknown reason all 14 year old girls add “fat” to there list of woes on a bad day. When I reached home I went to my room and sat on the floor wondering how much wigs cost and where to buy one. I started going through my tapes and records (to this day music is what eases my mind and my soul) and came across Cyndi Lauper’s True Colors. I didn’t listen to it right away. I just sat there staring at her. Her hair, her make up, her clothes. Then I grabbed her “She’s so unusual” album and stared at her some more. I sat there listening to her songs and staring at her hair and slowly felt a wee bit better. If she was okay being unusual, then I could be okay being unusual too.

The point to today’s tale is this. You can be yourself. People may not like it – let that be their problem. I have found that those who don’t support me are those who wish they could do their own thing but are too scared to even fathom the idea. For the parents out there – be kind to your children. Let them try new things with their hair and if they are made fun of because of their new mohawk, do not say “I told you so”. Tell them they look great and hug them. Ladies – when your gent is losing his hair…stop reminding him. Gents – when your lady tries a new cut and color…tell her she is beautiful. Everyone – when you see someone being mistreated, stand up for them.

“Never, never be afraid to do what is right, especially if the well-being of a person or an animal is at stake. Society’s punishments are small compared to the wounds we inflict on our soul when we look the other way.” – Martin Luther King, Jr.

Beauty, Business, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized, Women, writing

The Emily Post of holiday retail

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It’s official. The holiday retail season has begun. Macy’s parade has paraded through our living rooms, turkey’s have been served and Black Friday has come and gone. It is here. Get used to it. Accept it. I have. One thing I refuse to accept is being yelled at, mistreated or having a flat iron thrown at me or any of my employees. I have also been known to intervene and stick up for the girl behind the counter while doing my own shopping. Why you ask? I don’t know if it is because I am forty, because I have had a hysterectomy or because I just have no room for (pardon my french) bullshit or people behaving like an ass. (A smart ass I will embrace, an ass – kick ’em to the curb). Yelling at and bullying a cashier or salesperson makes you look like an ass. Yeah, I said it.

Being me, I have compiled a little list for you to follow. Keep it with you in your wallet or on your phone. When you feel your blood begin to boil because the last red sparkle polish has just been sold or your stylist can’t fit you in at 7:00 p.m. on Christmas Eve – pull out the list, take a breath and move on.

 

– When a product is on back order, we honestly do not know when it is arriving. We don’t. Most of the time the warehouse doesn’t even know when or if the reorders are arriving. We receive the product as soon as they do. I wish I had a better answer, I do not.

– When you decide you want to change your hair color, be prepared to put aside at least two hours. Thursday & Friday nights are always booked up early, as are Saturday’s. Call ahead or better yet, ALWAYS pre-book your next appointment.

– Do not attempt your own hair color at 6:00 p.m. on the eve of Christmas Eve and then scream at us on the phone at 8:00 p.m. that same night because we are fully booked and won’t stay late on Christmas Eve because we close at 4:00 p.m. so we can see our loved ones. – Yes! It’s true – salespeople and stylists have families too! We aren’t all party girls that raid discount malls and drink cocktails.

– If the shelf is empty and we tell you the product is on back order, it is. We are not hiding it on you. We are not holding it hostage to the highest bidder. You are not being Punk’d. You can bat your eyelashes, show your cleavage, wave a 20 in my face, (all of these scenario’s have personally happened to me over hairspray…yep…hairspray), it will not make the product magically appear, I don’t have it.

– You cannot return an item after it has been used because you didn’t like it. The last time I checked the definition of manufacturer’s defect – “I don’t like how these clippers fit in my hand” or “The smell of the hairspray doesn’t make me happy” didn’t match the definition. I agree there is a defect present – it isn’t with the product.

– Yelling at a 17 year old girl behind the counter because your credit card was declined is not acceptable. It is not her fault you went crazy at your local Walmart on Black Friday.

– Just because you say your child is a gift does not mean you can plant them under the tree at our store while you shop.

– I know it is a pain waiting in line, your feet hurt, you are hot in your coat. When you finally get up to the till, say hello, look the cashier in the eye. They are tired too and probably been there for over 6 hours without a break while having to be yelled at for things they didn’t do and worrying about their sick child at home. * Something you all need to know – there are many companies that allow their employee’s benefit’s as long as they work a certain amount of hours – don’t work the hours = no benefits. Remember that as you shop this season.

– It is not our fault when the debit machine goes down. I know it is a hassle for you – think about how it is for us. We get to hear for the next however many hours of “what a pain and hassle” it is for you, how you will “NEVER shop here again!”, all because the bank’s network is down.

– When you are offered a free gift with purchase, say thank you. There isn’t any strings attached. We are thanking you for your business. If you don’t want it – give it to the person behind you or the next person you pass on the street.

– ALWAYS give to the Salvation Army soldier you pass on the street or in the mall. ALWAYS.

– If you are not a christian and someone wishes you a “Merry Christmas” please do not be offended. We aren’t judging your religious beliefs or trying to convert you, calm down and remember – it is a season of reflection and giving – no matter what you believe. Be kind.

So there you have it my lovelies, the first of what I can expect of many installments of  The Emily Post of Holiday Retail. Pass it along. Remember this. As you are complaining that the “must have nail polish” is out of stock, there are many wondering if the food bank is out of stock. Be kind, give where and when you can, even if it is a smile or kind word…and don’t throw the flat iron.

 

 

 

Beauty, Business, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized, Women, writing

Tales of Truth – Part 6

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Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, gather round. Yes, it is that time again, tales of truth. The past week has been an unusual one, more so than normal. Maybe it’s the weather…a tad milder than normal, maybe it’s the holiday season approaching, maybe it is the pressure to have the turkey basted to perfection. I couldn’t put my finger on it until I was looking at my calender counting the days until the next available hour I would have to myself (December 3rd.) that I realized there is a full moon approaching. That explains everything.

Here is a glimpse into the daily life of that girl in the red coat, what I hear and what I see and sometimes wish I could un-see.

– “Your hair looks so nice, like fur, like….my cat. Oh, your hair reminds me of my cat.” – Thank god she said cat. (wait for it…there you go)

– “I want to get a Brazilian done. I heard it was easy enough. Do you think if I do the splits standing up and use the wall to hold my balance I could do it?”. I didn’t know what to say so I told her to You Tube the how to video on Brazilian Waxing. (You are gonna look it up now aren’t you? You know you are. You aren’t fooling anyone.).

– “If you can curl your hair with it, why do you call it a flat iron?” – how is it that these people make more money than I do?

– “Do you sell toe nail polish?” – had to explain that nail polish can be used on both finger nails and toe nails – I swear I did a shoulder check looking for a camera crew and Ashton Kutcher

– A customer asked the difference between root boost and mousse. I explained that “root boost is sprayed directly at the root, rub it in and then blow dry. A mousse is a foam that you disburse into your hand, emulsify it in both hands and rub it through out the hair, then blow dry.”. She stared at me and responded with “so..what’s the difference?” – Where is the principal’s office when you need it?

– A woman  called the shop asking me if I thought her hair color was too brassy. I told her it would be easier for me to tell if she was at the shop. She asked me why.

– I had a customer ask for a product line I did not carry. “I bought it here before! You don’t know what you are talking about.”. I apologized and explained that our shop has never carried that line. “Well , I know I bought it here! I shop here all the time! Give me your head office’s phone number!”. I told her we were locally owned and operated and not part of a chain. That’s when the light bulb switched on and she realized not only was she in the wrong store, she was on the wrong city. I offered her a complimentary mint.

– “My son loves computers. Can he come behind the counter while I shop?” – didn’t realize I had such a resemblance to Nanny McPhee

– A customer asked me if we sold Sebastian Shaper Plus. I said yes and took her over to the shelf. She just stood there saying “Really. You sell Sebastian Shaper Plus.”. She said it three times, then stared at me. I asked if she wanted me to get it down for her. She nodded as she stared and smiled and then walked up to the counter. I stood back for a minute- in case an alien sprang out of her chest or her head began to spin around.

There are five more days until the full moon. Although the thought of what may be said or seen does frighten me a little, it will make for some great tales to tell and maybe even bring a bit of laughter to an otherwise dull day.

Beauty, Business, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized, Women

You will find it if you know where to look.

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I know. I know. You began reading this blog because you wanted beauty tips, you wanted gossip, and you were praying for a magic wand to give you the exact potion to give you the hair of your favorite celebrity (they are extensions by the way. Unless your favorite celebrity is The Rock or Mr. Clean- trust me – they are extensions). I know the last few tales have been more about inner beauty, kindness and life in general but your wait is over. Today’s Salon tale is about product. Yes, it’s true. You can get back on your chair now.

My main goal everyday at the shop is to educate our customers/clients. If I don’t know something, I make damn sure I find out. When I find out useful tidbits of information, I pass them along. That is what I am doing today. As you know, companies are known to change, rename or discontinue products without any notice to the consumer. You know the feeling, much the same as when the guy who just professed his love trying to steal third didn’t call you or even give you a second glance. Well, ladies and gents, not all companies are like Larry the Lounge Lizard – some companies want to give us a heads up and even give us the new name or new replacement of our favorite products. Joico is one of those companies.

A few years ago, Joico renamed a few of their products. This past week I had an elderly lady looking for the shampoo that her husband loved. Everyone told her it was discontinued, it wasn’t made anymore. I was her “last kick at the can” as she put it. So I asked her what was the product and she told me “Joico Bojoba Shampoo”. I walked over to my Joico shelf,  grabbed her a bottle of the Daily Care Treatment Shampoo and told her “Here it is! Same product, same smell, new name.”. Well, wasn’t I her favorite person of the day, she actually giggled and couldn’t wait to get home and give it to her hubby. (the shampoo people…behave yourselves).

Being me, and not to let any of you down, I have compiled a list of the renamed Joico products. They are still the same products, they just have a new name.

– IceWhip is now JoiWhip

– IceMist is now JoiFix Firm

– IceLotion is now JoiLotion

– IceGel is now JoiGel Firm

– Altima Conditioner is now Daily Care Conditioner

– Kerapro Shampoo is now Daily Care Conditioning Shampoo

– Bojoba Shampoo is now Daily Care Treatment Shampoo

– Lite Conditioner is now Daily Care Balancing Conditioner

– Triage Shampoo is now Daily Care Balancing Shampoo

– Integrity is now Daily Care LeaveIn Detangler

So there you have it. As for all the stylists, salon owners and managers out there, hell sales people in general – there is this thing called a computer and it has the capability to look something up for you in about 30 seconds. When a customer or client asks about a product and you don’t know the answer – do not say “Oh…that’s discontinued” or “I don’t know what you are talking about”. In the immortal words of my father “LOOK IT UP!”.

Beauty, Business, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized

Mission accomplished

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Last night I had the privilege to attend a seminar. Yes, you read that right, I said privilege. I know, most people see seminars as a chore. With over 20 years in the customer service/sales game I know why most see seminars as a chore – some times you have to play a game, some times you have to role play scenario’s (that are never true to life), and most disappointing of all is when the speaker literally repeats the newest sales book word for word and tries to pass the words off as his own.(Plagiarism anyone?). From lingerie to automobiles, I have heard and seen it all. Literally. (Trust me, selling lingerie isn’t as elegant as it seems – I still can’t look at a garter belt without shuddering. As for being a woman in car sales…that is another tale for another time).

Back to the tale at hand. Last night I was invited to attend a business seminar by one of my reps, Melodie from Piidea. The speaker was eloquent, funny, informative and real. He was honest, to the point, put things in perspective, raised up his audience. His words were his own and when they weren’t, he quoted whose words they were. The gentleman I am speaking of is Kevin Agar.

What made last night’s seminar stand out above others I have attended in the past was this – it wasn’t just about making the sale or keeping the client. It was about living up to your potential, being accountable for your actions with your staff and your customers and yourself. One of the greatest aspects was that the tips he gave worked for our industry, business tips that aren’t the least bit awkward and are easy to implement. Most of all, it was about building a relationship with your clientele/customers – something I strive to do everyday. At our shop, I want everyone who crosses our threshold to feel beautiful, informed and educated. From looking around the room last night, if Mr. Agar’s mission was to do the same – mission accomplished.

 

 

 

 

health and wellness, lifestyle, Women

Kindness 101 Section 2

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You may be familiar with my previous blog, Kindness 101. No? Well, feel free to read it, you will find it in the July archives. In the past weeks many great things have been happening to myself and to others that I hold dear. The great events aren’t the only things we all  have had in common  – we all have been the brunt of a sarcastic or unkind word.

Ladies and gents, seriously, do I have to say this again? I know I am a mother but I HATE when I am forced to sound like one. BE NICE. BE KIND. Not sure what that means or how to do it? I have compiled a little list for you all. Feel free to add it to your favorites, share it on Facebook or print it off and keep it in your wallet for future reference.

– When someone is excited about their news, be excited with them = Kind. Respond with “hmpt…whatever…” = Not kind.

– When someone gets a Pixie cut tell them they look great =Kind. Telling them they look more like Peter Pan than a pixie =Not Kind

– A friend has lost 20 pounds and has 10 to go, hug them, tell them they can do it = Kind. Telling them “Are you sure it’s only 10” = Not kind.

– When someone is speaking to you, look them in the eye = Kind. You keep looking at your phone as they speak to you = Not kind.

– When someone is following their dream, even if it is to be the best damn basket weaver on the planet, tell them you have their back and want the first basket they weave = Kind. Asking them if they have joined a commune = Not kind.

– When someone is recovering from addiction and is having a trying day and wants a drink, offer to listen and tell them to call their sponsor =Kind. Telling them to “get over it” = Not kind (actually = Idiotic).

– When someone has colored their hair purple and red and they love it, love it with them =Kind. Telling them Sesame Street is looking for them =Not kind.

– Your friend gets a perm and it was over processed and she can’t fix it for a few days, help her try to style it = Kind. Telling her she needs a hat =Not kind.

– When someone has just lost a loved one, be it a parent or pet, take their hand and ask if they need anything, then shut up = Kind. Asking for every detail from time of death to burial while you Google embalming  = Not kind

– When someone’s dream is beginning to unfold for them, congratulate them, celebrate it = Kind. Telling them “Great, now you will forget all about me.” = Not Kind

– When someone’s parent is in the hospital and needs child care for their children, offer to take their children, free of charge = Kind. Calling and asking for an hourly rate = Not kind.

Trust me, I am the first to admit life is tough. I know how frustrating it is when things don’t go your way or work out as planned. One thing I do know is this – The more you belittle someone else, the smaller your life becomes. If you think your life is crap, your family vehicle will become the manure truck. Yeah, I know, taking the high road is exhausting. Trust me – I am thinking of investing in a portable oxygen mask. (wait for it…high road…lack of oxygen…there you go.).

Celebrate each other victories, big or small. Laugh with each other, not at each other. Be kind. It is really that simple. Treat people as you want to be treated…and don’t throw the flat iron.