Beauty, Business, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized

Do you want a sale or a customer?

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Customer service. A term that we all know, a term we have all heard, a term we have all been taught. Unfortunately, as of late, a term many are not utilizing to their full potential, if at all.

It happened again today. I had a customer come into the shop and when I asked her “can I help you find what you are looking for?” it was met with a scowl and a snap of “I’ll let you know. Can’t I just look around?”. I have heard this many times and just let it roll off my back, nine out of ten times it has nothing to do with my question. After a few minutes I said “Just so you know, if you can’t find what you are looking for, many companies changed their packaging this year. Let me know if you need some help.”. She was quite happy with what I had told her. You see, she was looking for a KMS product and her stylist said it was discontinued. It wasn’t discontinued, the packaging changed and they renamed the product – KMS Flat Out anti humidity seal is now KMS HairStay anti humidity seal. She was over the moon with excitement. We got to talking about product and she ended up apologizing for her response to my greeting, telling me “I’m not used to getting service and dealing with someone who knows what they are talking about.”. I thanked her and told her not to worry about it, I know just how she feels.

You see, I am not only the manager of our retail/salon, I am also a customer. I am a customer of our distributors and manufacturers and I know how frustrating it can be when you are not being listened to or given the proper information about the product you have purchased. In my opinion (you know I have to give it), in business, it all comes down to customer service. The better the customer service the more business you will receive. Personally, when we need a product at our shop, the owner and I tend to buy from the company that offers us the best customer service and support. Back to the tale at hand.

After speaking with my customer about her hair, I found out that it was over processed at her last appointment at her salon and she wasn’t happy at all. So I gave her a few samples of the Kpak Revitaluxe treatment to try and let her know that it would help her hair look and feel better and would help repair some of the damage. I asked her what she wanted her hair to look like. I asked her what products she used at home. I asked if she liked to blow dry or air dry her hair. She laughed and said I asked more questions than her stylist. I told her that was my job, to help her find what she needed so she could do her hair and like the results. I asked a few questions and showed honest interest in her and ended up selling three products and she left smiling and hopeful, and with our Salon price list.

Take the time with your customers. Customer service isn’t just about making the sale. It is about building a relationship with your customer/client. If you build a relationship and trust, not only will you have a sale, you will have a customer.

Beauty, Business, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized, Women, writing

No, I don’t want to tend the rabbits

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Ahhh, that all too familiar chirp of the door chime of my shop. A woman comes in and I ask her if I can give her a hand finding what she needs. She tells me “I am looking for a good conditioning treatment.”. So, I show her the Joico Kpak Revitaluxe. I admit that it is one of my favorites and tell her that everyone that has tried a sample has come back to buy it and I offer her a free sample. After explaining how it restores the porosity of the hair, she asks me “So, are you a stylist?”. “No, I am the manager and I have…” this is when I am spoken over with the all too familiar “Hmmppt…well if you are not a stylist, how can you know anything?” What I want to say is “well…hooked on phonics done worked for me and I done taught meself to read!”. Alas, that doesn’t happen. What happens is I smile, take a breath and explain that I have been in the beauty biz for over 10 years and in customer service for over 20 years. I explain that I have been to every product knowledge class and that I run the store, so I make sure I know everything about what I sell. She still looks at me like I am Forrest Gump or seems to wait for me to start talking about “tending the rabbits”.

Yes, it’s true. I am not a stylist. I am not an aesthetician. I am not a university graduate. What I am is intelligent, articulate, kind and one hell of a sales person and manager. Yeah, I said it. Muhammad Ali said it best “It ain’t braggin’ if you can back it up”, and I can back it up. Don’t get me wrong. I am  a firm believer of furthering one’s education. Some times life gets in the way and some of us aren’t able to go to college or university. That doesn’t mean that we are any less intelligent or capable as our post secondary peers. That being said, I also believe in educating yourself, about yourself. Finding out who you are and what you like, not what everyone expects you to be or what you “should” be and what you are supposed to like.

People tend to judge quickly. Yes, I am a girl standing in a shop, that does not mean I have always been a girl standing in a shop. Also, I have chosen to be where I am today. Yes, its true. Believe it or not…some of us actually enjoy what we do for  a living. Shocking, I know. I have had many experiences, corporately trained and such…a tale for another time.

You cannot teach passion, you either have it or you don’t. If you have passion for what you do as I do, you will become an expert because you will soak up all the knowledge and facts you can like a sponge. You will be excited and in turn make others excited. I have yet to hear of a course anywhere that can teach that.

I may not be a hair stylist,  but I can still teach you a thing or two.

Beauty, Business, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized, Women

What are you so scared of?

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Today’s tale is for all the stylists out there. Not a stylist? You may continue reading, you may even end up telling your stylist about this blog. It could help her be a better stylist and help you and her other clients like their hair for more than two days after the appointment.

You see, most Salon’s do not put any energy or focus into their retail. Retail meaning selling the products that they use during their services, be it a pomade or a flat iron. Everyday, and I mean everyday I have women coming into our shop saying the exact same thing… “I just had my hair done a few days ago and it looked great but now look at it!!! I don’t know what she (meaning the stylist) used and I can’t do my hair.”. So, this is wear my rendition of 20 questions begins. “What shape was the bottle she used?”. “What color was the bottle?”. “Did it foam up or did it look creamy?”. You get the point.

Something I cannot wrap my head around is this. A stylist has no problem telling their client that their service will cost $185.00 but they cannot muster up the courage to ask the client if she would like to purchase the mousse that was just put into her hair for $10.95. Seriously?!? It’s a win win. The client will be able to achieve the look you have just given them and the time in between each visit, your client will be happy with her hair and in turn with you, her stylist.

I have compiled a little list for all you stylists out there of what a client sitting in your chair should never hear. I mean NEVER.

– when your client asks “What’s that your using?” DO NOT answer “Oh, just some free stuff from my rep.”. Tell her what it is, tell her how to use it, offer to her that she can buy some on her way out.

– after finishing your color service and your client asks “What shampoo should I use?” DO NOT say “Oh, just pick something up at the drugstore”. – Are you crazy? Anything but professional shampoo could fade her color and make her hair look dull and lifeless – and guess what? When that happens she isn’t going to blame the shampoo – she’s gonna blame you.

– when your client asks about flat irons DO NOT answer her with “Oh…these are for professionals only” – come on…it’s not brain surgery…if you can iron a shirt, you can use a flat iron. Besides, it sounds a little rude and kind of belittles your client.

– if your client is currently using a professional hair care line that you do not carry, do not tell her “Oh, that line is crap!”. Now you have not only made yourself look stupid, you have insulted your client. Instead, compliment her choice and offer something similar that you carry. If you are not familiar with the line she uses, keep your mouth shut and after she leaves hop on Google and educate yourself.

If you decide to sell retail (which you should), sell the client the proper product, not the one with the highest commission or profit margin. Greedy will get you nowhere FAST. Think about it, would you like to be sold something that isn’t what you need just so the salesman gets a spiff? (Spiffs are when product has a higher commission put on it because the product needs to be sold).

All the manufacturer’s from A-G to Sebastian offer free product knowledge training for all salon employee’s. They offer awesome promo’s for your stylists and your customers. I have had many of the companies give me free product for a gift basket that my shop either puts in a monthly draw or offers as a donation for local charities.

In recent years the shampoos, conditioners and styling products at the drug stores and department stores have increased their prices and quite honestly, when they are not on sale, they are only $1.00 – $3.00 less than professional salon products. I believe our clients and customers deserve to have a good hair day everyday.

What about you?

Beauty, Business, communication, entertainment, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized

Tales of Truth…Part 6

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Ladies and gents, it’s that time again…tales of truth. To be clear, yes all the following events have happened to me personally, and no I don’t make these things up…sometimes, more than you know, I wish I did. I checked the calender and the full moon will not be upon us until the 29th. this month so I can only imagine what may be in store in the coming weeks. (By the way…most of the following events happened in one day. Yep. One day…yesterday. It was raining all day so if this is what rainy day people are like guess who will never live in Seattle.)

– Arrived at work by 8:45 a.m.. First phone call of the morning – A customer had shopped at the pet store next to our shop on the weekend  and bought a light bulb there. Then she came into our shop  and my ptg (part time girl) offered to put the light bulb in her bag. I guess once she get home the light bulb was missing. She called to ask if we had it. I told her we did not. I checked our lost and found and it was not there. She proceeded to tell me “well, it’s not in my car. It’s not in my bag. It’s not anywhere to be found.”. I told her that I didn’t have it either. She had a hard time accepting this…again with the Dr. Suess rendition of where is my light bulb. To be clear…we offer many services at our shop/salon…holding light bulbs hostage is not one of them.

– I live in Canada and the Ontario government makes me charge HST on products. I had a customer yell at me about the HST. Not about the government making me charge the tax, that I personally charge the tax and that I am not being fair to the consumer. Did I mention that is now only 9:45 a.m.?

– A woman got quite angry with me, her hands were shaking like she had just found her savior, because Goldwell had changed their packaging and reformulated the mousse she liked. It is now 10:15 a.m..

– At my shop, some of my distributor’s are kind enough to offer us a discount, and we like to pass the savings along to our clients/customers, so our prices tend to be about 10 -15 % lower than at other Salons. I had a woman get mad at me because our prices were lower than at her Salon and I couldn’t tell her why they don’t offer a discount. Time – 11:30 a.m..

– A woman wanted a new hairspray and I asked her what kind of hold does she like, to which she responded “What does that have to do with anything? I am looking for hairspray!”. Give it a minute….there you go. (She was thinking I meant another kind of holding I guess…that stuff is sold across the street).

So, to be clear…I will not hold a light bulb hostage, I did not make the decision to charge HST tax, I didn’t tell Goldwell to change their products or packaging, I do not know why other Salons do not help their clients/customers save money and  the only hold I am interested in is the hold of hairspray.

Beauty, Business, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized

Forget me not

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I hear the familiar chirp of the shop’s door chime and before I can greet my customer all I hear is “I need shampoo for gray hair and Vitae Hairspray.”. So, I take a breath and ask if there is a particular purple shampoo she prefers to which she snaps “I need a shampoo for gray hair! Didn’t you hear me?”. So I apologize and explain that purple shampoo is for gray hair to eliminate the brassy build up. That is when her lip started to quiver. I asked her if she was alright and if I could get her something to which she responded “I am sorry for snapping. I just put my mom in a rest home. She has Alzheimer’s.”. Before I knew it I was holding her hand. You see, I have personal experience with this horrible diagnosis. I have lost two grandfathers to this ailment and it is heartbreaking to watch. Heartbreaking.

She explained to me that she wanted the products her mom liked because her mom always liked having her hair just so and her makeup done everyday.  Her mother thought she was her hairdresser, she forgets she is her daughter. (this is how I know there is a higher power because I didn’t break down, I was able to keep it together for this woman.). You see, when one suffers from Alzheimer’s they regress to their youth, sometimes even a child like state, as it was with my grandfathers. This woman’s mother thought she was in her 20’s and kept wondering why someone put a wig on her.

The reason for today’s blog is this…be kind. Be kind to everyone. We never know what is happening to one another. If I had taken this woman’s attitude personally I never would have heard her story and given her a hand to hold. We never know when we may be able to offer someone comfort and shelter from what is waiting for them in their daily life.

Beauty, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized

Forgive me Gloria…

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To be clear, I am all for “girl power” and am a firm believer in equality. I am grateful to all the women who burned their bras and for their swollen feet and blisters for the marches they marched in so I can vote and have a library card without my daddy’s signature on it. (yes, up until the 1950’s in Canada a woman could not have a library card unless it had a man’s signature on it…my mother remembers my great grandmother taking her to the library the day women were allowed to have their own library card).This being said, as of late I am not seeing much equality out there. The lack of equality is not for the ladies…but for the gents. That’s right. I said it, for the gents.

Every time, I mean every time a gent comes in for product, the second he leaves some woman makes a snide remark, or pokes fun at him. “Isn’t that cute? He wants to do his hair.”. “Hmmppt…who is he trying to impress?”. “He must be gay.”. Yes, although it is 2012, people still have their head so far up their ass they cannot see daylight.

At least a couple of times a week gentlemen come into the shop for hair product. Sometimes they know exactly what they want…so many gents out there love KMS HairPlay Molding Paste and American Crew Fibre. Sometimes they come in looking for advice. Yes ladies, believe it or not, the gents like to look good too…and not just for us ladies…for themselves as well. Sometimes my male clients are feeling a little insecure because they are going through a divorce and haven’t changed their style in 10 years and just don’t know what to do. Some men come in because some jerk at the office made fun of their gray hair and now they think they have to dye it. On one occasion, a young man had just come out of closet and was celebrating his new cut and wanted the right product for his new style.

As women, we want equality. We want to be treated the same as men. So, if this is the case why is it that we as women can have anxiety but men cannot? Why is it that we as women can show fear but men cannot? Why is it as women we can take time and effort in our appearance for our own pleasure but when a man brushes his hair and teeth it is assumed he is “after something?”.

What astonishes me about this back woods mentality is this…if a man said a woman must be a slut if she does her hair and makeup…well, no one would stand for that. So why is it acceptable for a woman to call a man “vain and a womanizer” because he likes his hair to look good? Equality goes both ways ladies.

Want to be seen as an equal? Treat people as you want to be treated. You want respect? You gotta give it.

Beauty, Business, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized

Choose wisely…

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Every time I began today’s blog, by the time I had written ten words, I hit delete and started again. The first attempt was about Moroccanoil. The second attempt was about the first day of school drama. As I was hitting delete time and time again, the Dixie Chicks song “Everybody Knows” came through my earphones. The lyrics “Looking through the crowd, I search for somethin’ else, but every time I turn around, I run into myself”. Okay…got the hint.

What I really want to write about is choosing your battles. Much too often I see women freaking out over something as trivial as a discontinued nail polish shade, or yell at their stylist because they can’t make them look like Christie Brinkley. I see women belittle a stranger because she happened to grab the last can of Shaper Plus. I have had a woman cry, I mean ugly face cry because the flat iron she wanted was on order and wouldn’t be in until the next morning. Seriously…take a breath, open up your compact and take a look at yourself. Trust me, I know how frustrating things can be when they don’t go your way or when something interrupts your plans…in the last 3 weeks I have had my washer and dryer kick it at the same time, literally seconds apart. My 40 gallon water heater decided it was done being the hijacker of my hot water and decided to set the  hostage (being the water) free…in my basement. While cleaning up the water, my shop vac decided it was time to leave this earthly realm. The cherry on top of this sundae…my air conditioner decided it was feeling left out of the appliance exodus and followed suit by blowing a capacitor.

What did I do you ask? I laughed. My husband thought I had lost my mind, and for an instant maybe I did. I could have pitched a fit, thrown a tantrum, called the company and freaked  out on the poor soul who happened to answer my call, thrown a flat iron…but honestly, how would any of the above helped the situation? Would any of those antics make the washer and dryer begin to work? Would the shrill of my shout make the water run back into the water heater? Would a glare and a stomp make the shop vac…well…vac? Nope. I could have stayed in a foul mood all weekend and took my frustration out on anyone who got in my way, friend and foe alike.

The point to this blog you ask? Well, like I said earlier, it’s about choosing your battles. Take a good look at the situation. Is it a problem or an inconvenience?

House is on fire = problem. Your hair has frizz = inconvenience.

Husband has a heart attack = problem. Hairspray nozzle is clogged = inconvenience.

Loved one is in the I.C.U. = problem. Water exodus in basement = inconvenience.

Loved one flat lined = problem. Flat iron on order = inconvenience.

Choose wisely my friends.

 

Beauty, Business, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized

Salon Etiquette 101

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As you all know by now, I manage a Salon/retail shop. At least once a day, everyday (yes, I am serious…everyday) I feel like Miss. Beadle from Little House on the Prairie. Not because I am teaching someone something new – because I feel like I am dealing with Willie Oleson’s bad behaviour or Nellie Oleson’s nasty glare. Now, I have come to realize that maybe some of you cannot help your behaviour. No one had ever told you that it is not polite to throw a flat iron or it isn’t the best idea to sit on the floor and try out the nail polish that you haven’t purchased. So, me being me, I have compiled yet another list for you. Consider it a class in Salon Etiquette. Oh…and for the stylists out there, you may want to pay attention, for this list is for you as well. Come on now…you and I both know that not all stylists out there are behaving nicely or showing any professionalism for that matter. Now class, take your seats and pay attention to the lesson.

Salon Clientele –

– When purchasing a hair brush, please do not take each one off the shelf and run it through your hair. You see, now we cannot sell that brush to another client and we also cannot return it to the manufacturer. Would you want to buy a hairbrush that some person just used? Didn’t think so.

– When purchasing nail polish…do not open the bottle and try the polish on your nail. Again, now we cannot sell that polish to another client and we cannot return it to the manufacturer. All polishes come with a color swatch so you can put the nail swatch up  to your hand to see how the color looks. To clarify, although the swatch is shaped like a fingernail – the color looks the same on a toenail. (yep…if you’ve read my blog…you know the story).

– Do not take the lid off every hairspray and spray it to see if it sprays evenly. Yes, I have been privy to many an explanation by grown women try to explain to me the aerodynamics of hairspray and how it “lands” on the hair. (not to be confused with AG aerodynamic Hairspray…a nice light hold).

– When you are in my shop, all my products are professional salon products and name brands. Everything I sell is good. It comes down to what you are looking for and what your hair needs are. Unless your name is Honey BooBoo, please refrain from the old time favorite “Whatcha got here that’s good? I don’t want any crap stuff.”.

– If you wax and are suffering with red bumps or ingrown hairs on your bikini line, you can just tell us. Seriously, we know what red bumps are and what ingrown hairs are…please…I beg you…unless you look like (and others think you look like) Cindy Crawford…we don’t need to see it.

– We have all had bad hair days. We have all been fed up with our products. Take a breath. When we ask you what you want your hair to look like and what products you are currently using, don’t get mad. We are not blaming you for your hair mishap. We are asking so we know where to start from, to see what will work best for you…don’t get angry. Take a breath, have a complimentary chocolate.

– Just because your last stylist or salesperson didn’t know what they were doing doesn’t mean we are all like that. Be nice. Give us a chance.

Now, for the stylists –

– When your client arrives for their appointment and are in your chair, I don’t care if they have been coming to you for 20 years…do a consultation! Ask them if they were happy with their last service, confirm what you are doing that day. Ask if they have had any life changes, illness or new medication – for all of these factors could affect their hair.

– Got a color service booked? Make sure your client hasn’t been using “at home” color. If you need to ask me why…it may be time to rethink your career choice.

– When you are styling your client’s hair, tell them what you are using. Tell them how much to use and how to apply it. Teach them how to do their hair. SELL THEM THE PRODUCTS!!! This way they can be happy with their new cut for longer than a day. (hey…if you won’t sell it to them…I will gladly help them out…oh that’s right…I already do.).

– When your client is mistaken about a product, don’t pull a Nellie Oleson and laugh at her misconception. Be polite…how about trying “you know, a lot of people think that, but actually” and fill in the blanks. You want your clients to be nice to you? Be nice to them. Respect =respect.

– When the appointment is over, clarify if they need any of the products you used. RE-BOOK them! Women are busy, between work and kids and liquor store runs, they will forget about their hair until that moment they catch their roots in the rear view mirror. They will call for an appointment and won’t be able to get in…and guess what…it is your fault (that is what they are thinking at that moment). Re book them and this isn’t an issue and when they come for their appointment they will feel like you care about them…and we all want to feel that.

So there you have it, Salon Etiquette 101. Hopefully you all have learned something and I won’t be forced to put you in the corner beside Willie.

 

Beauty, Business, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized

If you don’t wanna play…get off the field

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Today’s tale is for our beloved clients/customers. Most clients/customers are too afraid to speak up because, well, the stylist is holding the scissors. So, I will speak for them. This tale is also being told in hopes that stylists and salon owners everywhere may learn something. Don’t make me get Tabatha after you.

It happened again. I know, how many times am I going to begin my tale with those words? A question that haunts me daily. Another ghostly mental question I pose to myself daily is this “why do stylists do that to their clients?”. Everyday, I mean EVERYDAY, I have a customer wander into the shop either scowling, pouting, weeping or staring at the ground refusing to make eye contact. What is the reason for these emotions and actions you ask? Poor client consultations and poor client/customer service. Plain and simple. These ladies and gents (yes…you pout too…the jig is up boys) have just left their Salon of choice without any explanation of what was just done to their hair and no idea of how to keep the new look or any information about which products will help them keeping their new do looking as it does at that moment.

Stylists! Your client is paying for a service. They are also your advertising. Guess what? If you don’t help them by giving them the proper products and teach them how to style their hair at home, they will go home and end up hating their hair and will blame you. Yes, you. They may return to you someday, but believe you me, they will have told everyone from the bank teller to the bag boy at the grocery store about how much they hate their hair and how it was your fault because of the cut/color you gave them. Trust me, I know of what I speak…I hear it from them everyday. When you buy a new cell phone, you expect the sales person to teach you all you need to know about that phone because you are paying for a product and a service. I think your clients deserve the same courtesy you expect, don’t you?

It is time to stop being lazy. Yeah, I said it, LAZY. Seriously, that is the reason why your clients are coming to my shop for hair advice.(well, and that I am pretty awesome if I do say so myself). If it takes 2 minutes or 20, I will take the time to listen and answer their questions. Sometimes they leave without a purchase, but they leave informed and feel like someone out there cares about them and how they look. Every stylist out there knows the right thing to do. They know they should have a consultation before each service, even if it is a client that they have had for 10 years. They know they should explain what products they are using and why and explain why professional salon products are better for their clients hair. It isn’t being done, I guess it is too much work…for them. These are usually the same stylists that complain they are having no shows and an empty chair.

We all want to be treated with courtesy and respect. We all want to look our best. None of us want to be left alone feeling stupid. None of us want to hate our hair. Stylists and Salon owners alike, take the extra few minutes and listen to your clients, take the extra few minutes and ask them if they need helpful hints on how to do their hair at home. Take a few minutes and ask them what products they have at home and if they don’t have the right products, show them which products are best and explain how to use them.

You never know, that client that you just rushed out the door with the new pixie cut and no product may be on the other side of the cell phone counter.

 

 

 

Beauty, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized

Sugar and spice and everything…nice?

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When I was a young girl I always preferred to play with the boys. We always had fun and there wasn’t ever any drama. When boys had a problem with each other, they told each other to shut up or hit each other and it was over. Gone and forgotten. It was awesome. Girls always seemed to be mean, never let anything go, too much trouble and too much drama – so I just went and played football with the boys. I always wondered where the drama came from. Where did it begin? Was it taught or just a part of the female DNA. I think I have the answer…I saw it happen before my own eyes.

There I was, humming along with Dylan Wickens and the Grand Naturals (proud to say – a childhood friend that thanks to facebook has re entered my life) and counting RUSK W8Less Plus hairspray for inventory. (I am a HUGE blues fan and missed the blues festival  because I was covering for my PTG (part time girl) so I brought in their CD, next best thing.). I hear the familiar chirp of the door. I look up and say “Hello Ladies! How are we today?” to which I hear “We would be better if she had better hair and my butt wasn’t so big.”. (I kid you not, that is what she said.). A mother and daughter, hating themselves and everything about being a woman. Not only did they continue to pick each other apart, the mother was picking apart women I can only assume were her friends. “Oh my gawd! Can you believe she thinks she can actually get that promotion?”, “Did you see what she was wearing – loses weight and now she is God’s gift – by the way, you could stand to lose a few pounds” and countless other nasty things. I stopped paying attention because I was beginning to lose I.Q. points being that close to such idiotic behavior. Yeah, I said it, IDIOTIC. I mean seriously, what kind of example is that?  The mother may have been in her early 40’s and the daughter couldn’t have been more than 10. As I watched them the way you watch a car wreck, I realized something. We as women need to change.

As women, we need to be raising each other up, we need to be praising each other and celebrating each other’s accomplishments – be it losing 10 pounds or landing that promotion. So me being me, I walked over and asked if they needed my help. I complimented the young girl on her pretty face and beautiful long hair to which the mom barked out “Yeah, but look how oily it is!” to which I responded “Oh, that’s normal honey, all girls have that trouble in their early teens and this shampoo (Senscience Specialty shampoo) will fix it right up, and a dry shampoo (Quantum Invisible dry shampoo) can help too.” to which the girl smiled and the mother scowled.

As Maya Angelou has written, we teach people how to treat us. It’s time to re-educate ourselves and women everywhere. We cannot change people but we can change how we deal with them. When you see a group of women cutting someone down, say something nice about their verbal victim. When you see a woman belittling her daughter, catch the girl’s eye and smile at her, give her a wink and shrug your shoulders – let her know it’s not her and not all women are mean. I know women that are still upset at someone for something that happened in high school – 25 years ago.

Ladies, it is time to let it go. It is time to be nice. It is time…feminists forgive me… to take a lesson from the men. Men confront the situation at hand, deal with it and move on. Doesn’t that sound lovely?