beauty, Business, communication, Fashion, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized, Women, writing

How do you look?

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So it has been over a week since my last tale. I could come up with every excuse in the book, the truth is I didn’t make myself a priority. As you know, I am a wife to a wonderful man and a mother to a glorious 16 year old young woman. Calm down ladies…I know I am not the only “career” mother out there…this is not a competition nor an episode of “The real housewives”…it is just a tale for today. Now, back to the tale at hand. As you also know I am the manager of a salon/retail shop. Everyday I make sure my hair is coiffed just so and my makeup applied and my pants pressed, and I look good. Yeah, I said it. What I came to realize this past week is I may have looked good on the outside…but my inside left a little to be desired.Not to sound all “Oprah”, I had given away my power. As last week progressed I could see that I wasn’t the only one.

I had a few customers that were, let say, interesting. One woman was being quite abrupt with her answers to my questions about what kind of hold she wanted from her hairspray. So, being me, I asked her if there was something I had done to upset her. She stared in silence. After about 10 seconds she said “I am sorry, I just got this new cut that I didn’t want. My stylist said I was to old for a bob and that I needed a short style.”. (I get severely pissed when I hear this, and I hear this often. Yo Stylists! Who are you to tell people that they are too old for a cut? Seriously…get a grip and become a professional). So, I assured her the cut was cute (which it was) and sold her some KMS Hair Play Molding Paste for some funky styling and she likes her hair to look shiny so we added some SOMA Prism shine spray to the mix…and I also gave her our Salon price list.

I had a customer this week that introduced herself as “stupid and useless”. I shit you not, that is what she answered when I asked “How ya doin’ today”. You see, she was trying to grow out her hair for her daughter’s wedding in the fall and gave up because she listened to the wrong people – the people who told her that a flat iron was “too complicated” for her. (Who the hell are these people?!?). I took her over to our flat iron demo display and told her to pick one up as I picked one up. We both were in the mirror’s reflection, so I told her to copy what I was doing. After about 30 seconds a smile crept across her face and she said “I can grow out my hair!”. I looked her straight in the eye and told her to stop listening to the “Can’t” people in her life and listen for the “Can” people…they are out there. They are a little harder to hear over the annoying antics of the “can’t” court jesters.

A woman has lost some weight. She has lost 22 pounds over the course of 8 months. She began to exercise. She began to eat a healthy diet in support of her husband’s health issues. She didn’t lose the weight to “show off” or “rekindle her twenties” or “to keep her marriage alive” or because she was having a “cougar crisis”. The weight loss was a positive perk of embracing a healthier lifestyle, for her family and herself. That woman is me, and yes, the above comments have been directed at me. 10 years ago, I would have listened to the nasty comments and gone and ate a cake…or two. Guess what buttercup…not anymore. I have come to realize that those who are negative, nasty or assholes – take your pick, are empty inside…plain and simple. They are so miserable that they have to pull you down to their level so no one will see how crappy their lives are. Funny thing is, they cannot even fathom the idea that no one really gives a shit, except them and others like them.

I know I say it all the time, but I was raised on Little House on the Prairie and Happy Days so get used to it. BE KIND. Raise others up, do not push them down. Your BFF gets a new cut and loves it? Love it with her. A friend is struggling with her hatred of her thighs? Go to the gym with her – don’t agree and tell her she “really needs to work on that”. A friend loses weight? Applaud her efforts and ask her how she did it. Do not  mock her and ask her “cutting out the calories trying to be a cougar?”.

“If you don’t look good, we don’t look good”. – Mr. Vidal Sassoon

beauty, Business, communication, Hair Care, Uncategorized, Women, writing

Tales of Truth – Part 8

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Gather ’round ladies and gents, girls and boys, it is time for that girl in the red coat’s Tales of Truth. Just when I think I have seen and heard it all, I hear the chirp of the shop’s door chime and VOILA!, more tales to be told. As I have stated before, all these tales are true, they are based on actual events. The tales are not those of fiction, unfortunate, yet true.

(before I begin our first tale – let me give you a little background tale) In Canada, we are slowly getting rid of our beloved penny…not the Penny from The Big Bang Theory…the currency. We can still accept pennies as payment, we are no longer giving them back with change. Now on with the tale. As I was finishing ringing through a customer’s purchase of RUSK Wless hairspray, I told her the total was $19.85. She looked into her wallet then looked up at me with the most terrified look in her eyes. I asked her “Is everything alright?”, to which she responded with “No!”. I asked her what was the matter to which she responded “I don’t have a nickel. I only have 5 pennies!”. So, I said “Okay, that is fine.” to which she said “Are you sure you won’t get in trouble for taking pennies now that they are abolished?”. I took a breath, told myself not to show it on my face, and explained to her the new “rules” about pennies to which she sighed “thank you for telling me, I was so scared every time I opened my wallet!”. …thank god she never worked the underground railroad.

 

I hear the familiar chirp of the door chime and look up to see a woman, staring at me. “Hello! Do you need my help with something today?” I ask. “I have a question for you about hairspray.” she says, then stares at me again. Dear lord…here we go. “What is your question?” I ask. She shuffles closer to me, bows her head and in a whisper asks “Is it safe to use hairspray?”. So, I did what anyone would do in this scene, I whispered back “why wouldn’t it be safe?”. (during all of this, all I could picture was the Eiffel tower in the background, a couple of cigarettes and a black briefcase containing “zee meecrofilm”.). It seems her sister in law told her that all hairsprays will change your hair color and that is why her hair was looking “brassy”. I told her that it was safe to use hairspray, that it will not change her hair color and that her sister in law needs a new hobby other than surfing the net. She bought two cans of Sebastian Shaper Plus.

 

It was about 10 minutes to closing. It seems the most interesting events happen to me within the first 20 minutes of my day or the last 10 minutes of my day at the shop, and most of the time without a witness. (I really gotta get a camera). Back to the tale at hand. A woman comes up to the counter asking for an appointment for a hair cut. I explain the Salon was closed but would be open again the next day and there was an opening for a cut if she wanted to take that appointment and come back the next day. She said she had to think about it and left. Within seconds she was back, I assumed to take the appointment. NOPE! “Have you accepted Jesus Christ into your heart?” is what she came back for. Before I could say a thing… “If you haven’t…do you want to be saved?!?….Oh, I wanted to be saved alright.

“Is this hair color temporary?” (there is a lime green sign that says “temporary color”). “Yes, it is. It will wash out within two washes, with shampoo”, I answer, with a smile, to which she answered “Pfft…two washes…that ain’t temporary. I know temporary and that ain’t it.”. …yep…this is my life.

beauty, Business, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized, Women, writing

Blow out

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Today’s tale is an educational tale. I believe knowledge is power so today I am spreadin’ the word about Professional Hair Dryers. Before you ask, yes, there is a difference between what you find under the “blue light special” and what you can purchase from a Salon. Professional Salon Hair Dryers, or Blow Dryers if you prefer have a stronger motor and blow the air faster and hotter.

The following is a break down of the differences between AC/DC…motors people…not the band.

AC Motor Hair Dryers

– larger/heavier motor

– slower rpm’s – 1500/2000

– a little more durable- motor can last between 700-1200 hours – depending on quantity of use.

– less noisy

– extra powerful airflow = faster drying

– tend to be more expensive

DC Motor Hair Dryers

– smaller/lighter motor

– faster rpm’s – 5000/6000

– usually lasts between 400-700 hours (depending on usage)

– are a little noisier than the AC motor but still quieter than your department store brands

– air flow is not as powerful as AC motor but still does a great job in drying the hair quickly

– less expensive

*by less noisy than department store brands, I mean that you won’t get that high pitch hum/squeal sound emanating from behind the bathroom door frightening the cat.

Oh yes…by the way…WATTAGE has nothing to do with the volume of airflow nor does it reflect the heat output.  Wattage = Power Consumption, plain and simple. The greater the wattage, the greater the power consumption and the greater the speed the fan rotates. So, just because the box may state 2000 Watts of Power! doesn’t necessarily mean it is a better Hair Dryer than the 1700 Watt beauty right beside it.

When purchasing a Professional Hair Dryer, you want to look for the following;

– Does it come with a directional nozzle (for styling)

– If you have curls you want to be sure it comes with a diffuser. * Diffusers  are not a universal fit. Your old diffuser may not fit onto your new dryer.

– What is the warranty? Do you need to keep the receipt and the box?

– How many air flow/heat settings are available?

– Price. A higher price does not always mean a better product….sometimes the price is higher because of the name, yeah…I said it.

So there you go. A little more knowledge for you and the next time you go to purchase a Hair Dryer you will know if the sales person is helping you find the right dryer for you or just blowing hot air.

beauty, communication, health and wellness, Uncategorized, Women, writing

What’s your sign?

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Today marks my 1 year anniversary in the blogging world. 1 year. Wow. Last year at this time I sat at our home computer with a quivering hand hovering over the “publish” icon…so afraid that I would fail, that no one would read my silly opinions or think I was funny. What I really was afraid of was succeeding. Yep. Afraid to succeed and not for the reasons you think. I wasn’t fearful of people now expecting better of me, I was scared shitless that success would make me look back on my past 20 years and realize I should have been doing this all along and my world would come crumbling down. Then I realized that the only reason I was able to do this was because of my past 20 years. – I say 20 years because quite honestly before the age of 21, we don’t know a damn thing. One of my favorite quotes (now) is by Mark Twain – “When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much he had learned in 7 years.”.

Back to the tale at hand. In past blogs I have written about kindness, about taking the time to listen, to take the time to see, really see the person in front of you. We all have struggles and stresses in this life – Christ – this past year I feel like I have lived 5 years in the span of 12 months. There were days I wanted to wear a sign around my neck to let the world know what I was going through that day and then maybe I wouldn’t get a flat iron thrown at me. (It happened more than once – I have witnesses). One day the sign would have read “Father in hospital”. Another day it would have read “Husband’s heart medication is working against him”. Another day it would have read “My daughter has to deal with a sick parent way before she should have to.”.

The one thing the past year has taught me is this…DO NOT WAIT. In the blink of an eye your life can and will change – it may feel like for the worse but the best comes out soon enough. Take your kids to the park – even when you are tired and bored. Take the time for your spouse – for cuddles on the couch or romps in the boudoir. Leave the crumbs on the kitchen floor for a couple of hours and watch the movie with your kids. When your hubby comes up from behind and hugs you while you are doing the dishes, let the dishes soak and hug him back and be sure not to be the one who stops hugging first. Start your blog – tell your story.

I have also learned we all have our own signs, some are harder to see, but are always able to be read if we take the time and pay attention and show a little kindness.

beauty, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized, Women, writing

Reflection

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“Looking through the crowd, I search for somethin’ else, every time I turn around I run into myself”. – Dixie Chicks

One of the hardest jobs is being a parent. We worry if we are raising our kids right, if they are in the right school, if they have nice friends, if they are eating all the four food groups. I don’t know about you all but what I find the most difficult about being a parent is letting my daughter figure out who she is, and constantly reminding myself that she is not me and may not have the same issues that I had at her age. (just because I was smoking and skipping class doesn’t mean she will…actually she has a perfect attendance record…and yes, she is mine. I have the records to prove it).

At least once a week I meet a mother/daughter duo and you can tell the mother is trying to correct the mistakes of her youth through her daughter. One young lady came in asking about going blonde and before I could offer her an appointment with one of our stylists “I bleached my hair in my teens and ruined it so there is no way in hell I am letting my daughter do it.” is what I heard from the mother. It was at this moment that that the daughter looked down at her ripped up vintage chucks with no hope of ever raising her chin. So, me being me, I asked the mom if she had gone blonde at a salon, to which she said “well…no.”. Out of the corner of my eye I saw the daughter begin to raise her chin. I let the mom know that my “blonde” was done in our Salon and she did say “your hair doesn’t look damaged”…now the chin was completely raised and there was the beginning of a smile. I went on to offer our Salon price list and the card of our stylist and let them know they could make an appointment for a free consultation. I looked at the daughter who was now smiling and let her know that if she went blonde there would be up keep and she would need to take care of her hair with professional products like SOMA Blonde Silver Shampoo once a week and Joico’s Kpak Revitaluxe once a week as well.

We were teens once, we know what they can get up to, hell, we got up to it. As parents, all we can do is educate and enlighten, and then hope for the best. What we must not do is assume that our kids are going to do what we did. We must not assume because we smoke and drank at 15 that they will. We must not tell our daughter’s that cutting off their hair was a “huge mistake” because we thought it was when we were 14. We must not tell our son’s that a mohawk makes them “look like a thug” because that is what your parents thought.

Your children are a reflection of you, they are not you, they are their own person, and maybe, just maybe, they will make better choices in their teens then we did in ours.

beauty, Business, communication, Hair Care, Uncategorized, Women, writing

Tales of Truth – Part 7

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Yep…you read it right…part 7. I’m telling ya, between the February “blahs”, the snow and grey days and the full moon, do I have some tales for you. I find myself wondering if my readers are beginning to send these people into my shop to see if I will either write about their escapades or to see if I will finally snap. As I have stated before, these tales are based on true events (sad…but true).

– A woman came in looking for a new shampoo and conditioner for fine hair. She had tried Joico’s Body Luxe, Matrix’s Total Results Amplify and KMS Add Volume and wanted something new. I showed her the Redken Body Full which is formulated for baby fine hair. She took the bottles in hand and then asked me “this conditioner says light, does that mean it is diet?”. …I am afraid I may let some of you down for I had a hard time stifling the giggle in my voice as I explained that “light” meant it wouldn’t weigh down her hair. (I sounded like Mickey Mouse for a moment…not one of my proudest moments but come on….diet conditioner?)

– A woman came in asking what I could sell her to make her roots not grow out so fast….enough said.

– From time to time I will order in a product that we don’t normally stock in the shop, so I take the customer’s name and number so I can call them when the order arrives. I called one woman to let her know her product arrived and was asked how I got her number.

– There is the sound of chatter and blow dryers and you can see women leaving with their hair beautifully coiffed…a woman comes up to the front counter with her hairspray, stands beside our Salon price list and says “do you have a Salon?” – happens at least 4 times a week…every week.

– The phone rings. I answer with my usual happy greeting. “Do you sell sinks?” is what I am asked. I let the gentleman on the other end of the phone know that we are a retailer and we   sell hair & nail products, to which he says “Yeah…so do you sell sinks?”. I let him know that he needs to get in touch with a wholesaler and even give him a number to call. The phone is dead silent except for a few heavy breaths, then he says “So, you don’t sell sinks then?”.

– A woman complained that her firm hold hairspray had too good of a hold. I asked her if she found it too sticky, or too hard, or if it felt crunchy. She said “No, it’s none of those. It just holds too good.”. – couldn’t help but wonder…does she complain that the Charmin is too squeezable?

– I would not suggest using your 30 Volume peroxide on household injuries or cuts…you don’t want to know.

– Every month we have a monthly draw. We have a sign and ballots right beside the product that is the monthly draw. Every day, at least 20 times a day, I hear “What’s your monthly draw?”…seriously…did hooked on phonics work for anyone?

 

 

 

beauty, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized, Women, writing

Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda

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It has been over a week since my last post. As you know, I am a manager of a glorious salon/shop, a mother of a girl on the verge of 16, a wife, a blogger (hey I missed a week…ease up), and a gal who is slowly but surely embarking on yet another path – retail/salon consultant….oh, and I love to bake tasty treats. Some people see that as busy or over loaded, I see it as life, my life. The past week has been overloaded. I am not getting into details because quite honestly, what’s done is done and there is nothing I can do to change it, I can just deal with the here and now. Nope…you can keep asking…not gonna get into it.

I realized this morning as I told my hairspray to “screw off” because it wasn’t spraying properly, that I had to take a step back and take a moment for me. A moment that didn’t include cooking, cleaning or looking after anyone else. I have written of this before and will continue to write about it, as women, we forget about ourselves. We put everyone else first, put ourselves last and then blame everyone else. Yeah, I said it. You know it’s true. Think about it…how many times have you looked at the kitchen floor at the end of the day and thought “I am the ONLY one who will sweep this floor!”, you don’t ask for someone else to help, you sweep the floor and then proceed to tell everyone in your household “Nothing” when they ask what is the matter. Then your poor hubby asks if you picked up the dry cleaning and you answer with a sarcastic tone, an argument ensues, you end up crying with mascara running down your face and snot hanging from your nose stammering out “I…never…get…any…help!” as your family waits for your head to spin around. Trust me, in the past (month)I have been that woman and am trying with all my might to not be her. It isn’t fair to your family. Most importantly, it isn’t fair to you. To save your family and yourself some grief and to save a call to your local Archdiocese, check out the following little list;

 

– If you want to go out for dinner – tell your hubby that you want to out for dinner. He is not Timmy and you are not Lassie “what’s that girl? You want to go out for dinner?”

– If you want to change your hair color to a certain shade of red, tell your stylist. Bring a picture of the exact color you want. Sitting in their chair hoping they remember the shade of the red M&M but a little deeper red ain’t gonna cut it.

– If you are not happy with the cut your stylist is giving you, tell them. If you sit there and smile and say you love it, they are going to keep giving you the same style. I am all for positive thinking but sitting in the chair and using “the Secret” to attract the style you want won’t work. It won’t.

– If you want to go out with your girlfriend for coffee, call her up and ask. Sitting around complaining that no one ever calls you makes you, well 13 years old.

– If you need help around the house, ask for it. Chanting “Cinderella, Cinderella…all day long it’s Cinderella” may not insure aid.

– If you want your gent to bring you flowers, tell him. NICELY. Having Diamond & Streisand playing “you don’t bring me flowers” on repeat every time he crosses the threshold is a little over the top.

No one can help you if you don’t tell them you need help. No one knows what you need unless you tell them what you need. A baby will cry at everything you give them until you give them the thing they want for Christ’s sake, so I think you can ask for someone to sweep the floor. Home and family should be one of the most beautiful things in your life, why ugly it up with shoulda’s, coulda’s and woulda’s?

 

 

 

 

 

beauty, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized, Women, writing

Would you be your valentine?

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It’s February 11th. T minus 3 days until the big day…Valentine’s day. On the radio, at the shop, in the express check out line at the grocery store I hear the same things “He better not forget my favorite chocolate!”, “I better be getting the biggest bottle of Moroccanoil money can buy!”, “If he knows what is good for him I will get a spa package for Valentine’s day!”. Besides getting to be a witness to this ugliness I also got to see a sad, sorry sight…a terrified grown man holding two stuffed bears…most likely terrified because he knew if he didn’t come home with the right gift on Valentine’s day, it may very well be his last Valentine’s day. Quite honestly, if that is how the relationship works, his better half is lucky he is coming home at all. Yeah, I said it.

As you know, from time to time I tell a tale not of Salon ideals or product knowledge but of what goes through my mind, my opinions, take ’em or leave ’em. Today is such a day with such a tale. So many people wait for February 14th. to shower their loved ones with gifts, compliments and love instead of doing it everyday. We put way too much pressure on ourselves and our relationship’s because of a date on the calender.

Here’s an idea…how about we try to have a little Valentine’s everyday. Oh calm down ladies. I am not saying you need to be in a teddy and 6 inch stiletto’s waiting at the door with a martini, but a compliment or a thank you for taking out the trash might be nice…not just for your better half, but for yourself as well. As for the gents, I am not saying you need to bring home flowers every week, but a kiss hello and goodbye everyday would be lovely, again, not just for your better half, but for yourself as well. If one of you ain’t happy…nobody’s happy.

I have quoted Ms. Angelou before and will continue to say it, you teach people how to treat you. Ladies…if you want your gent to get you your favorite chocolates and a spa day…try not making him recite on a daily basis a list of your favorite chocolates and spa services. How about you try being nice. Remember Nellie Oleson? Yeah…she didn’t get what she wanted until she was…NICE. (you know….Percival came to save the restaurant and….oh, go rent the DVD.). As for the gents in the house…if you want your wife to spice up the bedroom attire…telling her that the bra and pantie set you bought her looked great on “Destiny” at the “club” probably isn’t the best compliment. I know you think it is. Trust me…it’s not.

Hug one another every day. Kiss each other hello and goodbye every day. Say “I love you” when you leave the house for the day or before you put your head down each night. Compliment each other. If you criticize, try your best to be kind.- Ladies…if it is that time of the month…wait a day or two to criticize – yeah, I said it. You are not in the right frame of mind and you know it and honestly it just frightens our poor gents. *side note to the gents – if you know what is good for you – you will NEVER mention the above out loud.

beauty, Business, communication, Hair Care, health and wellness, Uncategorized, Women, writing

Alright….where’s the camera

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Ever have one of those days that you find yourself looking over your shoulder, looking up and down in search of the camera crew and Suzanne Somers to jump out and say “Smile! You’re on candid camera!”. Today I was praying for such an exclamation that never came. Sad but true, the following tales are true and they all happened to yours truly today.

The phone rings. “Is it safe to get my hair colored?” is the question posed to me. “I’m sorry.” I say, “why do you ask if it is safe to get your hair colored?” to which she answers “I read in the paper that someone in Florida died while getting their hair colored!”. (10 bucks the “paper” started with an N and ended with an R)…by the way, it’s 9:40 a.m.. The shop has been open 10 minutes.

A woman comes into the shop with a can of hairspray. “I bought this here and it is defective!”. So I ask her what seems to be the issue with the hairspray. (from time to time aerosol cans don’t spray properly and we will gladly exchange them). “The issue is it sounds funny every time I use it.”. I shit you not people, it is what she said. So I take the can and spray it a few times and it sounds like hairspray being sprayed out of an aerosol can. I tell her “It is spraying evenly and not clogging up, I can’t see a defect with the product.” to which she says “well, I don’t like the sound it makes, maybe another will sound better”. …it’s 10:30 a.m..

A woman came in the store to tell me in great detail about how crappy her life is and how she can’t seem to get rid of the pesky rash she has “down there” ever since she had a brazilian wax….maybe I should re think the whole “how are you today” greeting….it’s 11:30 a.m.

I had a woman complain about having to pay retail prices when she is a hairdresser, so I offer the address to the wholesaler’s in our area and she proceeds to explain “well…I’m not really a hairdresser, I never got my license but I did go to school, but I never finished, but I still do hair, so I think I deserve wholesale prices”….that’s like saying you’re an E.R. doctor because you took first aid in the Girl Guides.

Last but certainly not least, a lovely couple came in about 20 minutes before closing. The woman told me she was looking for wax for hair removal. I showed her our selection and asked if she needed hard wax or cream wax. I never should have asked. It was at this moment that her Romeo was at her side and they explained,quite joyously that they prefer hard wax because they give each other brazilian waxes. Let’s add this to the ever growing list of things I really don’t need to know.

So there you have it, a glimpse into the daily happenings of That girl in the red coat. This is why I don’t watch much reality T.V., I get enough of it at work.

beauty, communication, health and wellness, Uncategorized, Women, writing

Whatever floats your boat

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Something has been playing on my mind as of late, and being me I gotta talk about it, I gotta. Working at a Salon, I hear lots of tales, of happiness, of despair, of births and deaths and everything in between. The tales that I find the most upsetting are those of shame. Grown women being ashamed of their bodies, their body image or lack there of and of their sex life. Unless you were in a convent or in a coma, I am sure you have heard of or read 50 shades of grey.  I know that most of our clientele has read it or heard about it. I read the trilogy.Twice. Yeah…I said it. Some of the women spoke openly about it and we shared some cackles and blushes. Some of the women whispered about it, afraid that if they spoke openly and loudly about their book club choice that they would be judged. Some women hid the fact they were reading it because they didn’t want their husbands or best friends judging them, they didn’t want people thinking they were a slut. One woman I know was ashamed that she liked what she read and this is why I am writing this today.

When we are young, we are always being told to be a “good girl” and “nice girls” don’t behave like that – be it wearing too much lipstick, a low cut blouse, teasing our hair, kicking boys in the shin or kissing them in the back seat. What I have come to realize is this. Grown  women forget that they are grown women now, not little girls under the ever watchful judgmental eye of society. If what you wear or how you choose to live your life makes you happy and is YOUR CHOICE, there is no shame to be had.

Forgive me ladies for what I am about to say. We prejudge our husbands/partners and don’t give them the benefit of the doubt. Yeah…I said it. You know it’s true. We are all guilty of it. So many women I know that read 50 shades said “there is no way I am telling my husband I liked that book! He’ll think I am  a freak!” to which I always answered “He probably will and he will be over the moon!”. Some ladies laughed, others just stared and I could see their wheels of judgement begin to turn, to which I began to sing to myself…Big wheel keep on turnin’, Proud Mary keep on burnin’.

Too many women let the opinions (or what they think are the opinions) of the general public decide their fate. Some things you must realize. There will always be someone who will point a finger in judgement. You know the people I am talking about, the ones who would have judged Christ himself “How could the son of GOD make water into wine?!?!”. Get used to it and try your best not to let it get to you. If you want to wear thigh high boots and mini skirts because it makes you feel beautiful, do it. If having platinum blonde hair extensions makes you feel sexy and attractive, wear them. If you like how your eyes look while wearing false eyelashes, apply them and bat away. If you like to read erotica and it helps you and your better half have a more intimate relationship in and out of the bedroom, read away. If judging others floats your boat, row away. Far, far away.